Sorry for the absence the past so many days. A fever, attracted by my freshly showered and foolishly undried hair, had traveled on the wind and wormed its way through the tiny gaps of my window screen to make a home somewhere in the surface quarters of my brain cavity. Unfortunately my immune system had long ago been chased off by bronchitis and lead poisoning, so the beast had no problem ravaging my body with other lovely ailments and leaving me in the bed, bound and drugged.
But now that I've found the strength to repel the demon within, my fingers are once again free to rant and rumble and share with you all of my life's many sour grumbles. The topic of today's tale?
This little bastard!
"Now, now, Mr. Nathan, do watch your language." My apologies, dear audience, but I didn't say it to be mean. Google+, or Google Plus, whichever you'd prefer, is quite literally the bastard child of Facebook and Google, and has more birth defects than a fourth-generation inbred cat.
No. Fucking. Way.
For those of you not in the know, Google+ is being called by man a "Facebook killer" and "Google's answer to Facebook." Right now the program is in a beta trial phase and only available to those who have been invited, much like the original GMail setup. It seems to at least pretend to earn its titles, but after a quick look around, the navigational maze and the empty-yet-cluttered display aren't the only things stopping Google+ from winning any favors.
This was all kind of disappointing to me, because it seemed like all of my friends were raving about how revolutionary and awesome Google+ was, and how it was going to end Facebook in a matter of months. To be honest, I really don't see that happening short or long term. Google+ doesn't really offer anything that Facebook doesn't, except for an easier list of your "likes" to browse through and a disregard for privacy. What it does offer at the moment essentially consists of a news feed and a status, as well as the patented "+1" button, which is essentially a "Like" button, and an impossible to navigate hedge maze of an interface.
Contacts are stored in convoluted sections called "circles" which are basically a less organized form of "groups," which I guess some people never learned about because a lot of bloggers seem to be praising Google+ for the feature that "Facebook never had." There's also something called a "Hangout" which requires a webcam, so I haven't tried it yet, but I assume that if you have Skype, you don't need to bother.
This show and Google+ are equally original.
I assume they'll have an equal amount of episodes.
Alright, maybe likening Google+ to the bane of Hannah-Barbera isn't exactly fair, because the program does have two nifty things. For starters, the social networking aspect includes a section in the user profile where you can list all of the places you've lived over the course of your life, and a handy dandy Google Map shows up to pinpoint all of these locations.
The second nifty thing the program brings to the internetic (term coined, Nathan DiYorio, 2011) table isn't even really part of the greater social networking experience. This would be the "+1" button appearing on the Google search engine. This allows users to "+1" the search results they happen to approve of, and for those of you with a Google account, your friends can see if you've liked a result in the search. This system could drastically alter the way searches are handled, on both a personal and community scale.
The fact that your friends have +1'ed a search result could mean that Google will be more likely to show you that search result, as you'll probably like it too. Google may also be more likely to provide the more popular results of the global opinion. Ultimately this will allow search engines to more accurately locate the most appreciated websites, while also generating a more individualized search.
Unfortunately, nobody knows if this is what Google has in mind. Also, "+1ing" is much more difficult to say than "Liking."
Ultimately, I think the Google+ program has far more potential as a search enhancement than as a social networking utility. Given Google's track record with social networks, they would probably be better off refining the search algorithm than trying to force their way into an entirely different dogfight.
Mario seems to have built an identity as the Mickey Mouse of video games. Clean, brave, and noble, Mario treats all beings equally and always succeeds at presenting the moral standard. But deep in his closet, Italy's digital pioneer is hiding more than a few skeletons... or should we say brassieres?
Most everyone is pretty familiar with Mario's public sweetheart, Princess Peach, but they don't always know about the dames he's left behind to get to where he's at today. Mario's popped quite a few mushrooms in his day, and not all of them happened before he met the lovely Miss Toadstool. Today we're going to take a look at some of Mario's misfortunate madams and where they're at now!
Pauline
Back in the days when Nintendo was merely a developer trying to make some quick cash on that recent "vidia gamez fad," Mario was still a humble carpenter and plumber working on construction projects and trying to live his life the way most stereotypical New York Italians do...
...one hussy at a time.
We're not sure at what point Mario met this "Pauline" character, but we do know that apes absolutely adore her. The original Donkey Kong, now the crotchety old timer we know as Cranky, was the first of Mario's enemies and the originator of the plumber's profession of "Princess Rescuing," despite Pauline not actually being one.
Pauline continued to support Mario through a few cheesy cartoons and even joined him in Nintendo's Pinball on the NES. She wouldn't be mentioned for many, many years. It wasn't until Mario hit a midlife crisis and invited her into the Mushroom Kingdom to play the role of damsel-in-distress for the Mario vs Donkey Kong series that the harlot would return to darken Nintendo's doorstep. Like in her original appearance, Pauline is somewhat of an ape charmer. In this series she is constantly at the mercy of a love enraged Donkey Kong III, who seems to have completely forgotten about his engagement to Candy. Despite the wild antics of the modern generation Donkey Kong, Pauline usually finds his motives to be sweet, and the result seems to hint at a possible relationship between the two, or at the least the beginnings of one.
And thus, AIDS swept through the Kingdom.
Daniella
Daniella is the least known of Mario's dames. She's the second Brooklyn gal to fall into his arms, and there's a pretty good chance she and Pauline have shared a bed. Her only appearance was in the dreadful Super Mario Bros. film that tried to pretend that it was Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Of all the woman Mario's had to rescue, Daniella is the least developed, being nothing more than a typical Brooklyn babe with a pair of overly expressive Koopa shells.
This one might be the only actual skeleton in Mario's closet.
Princess Daisy
After hooking up with Princess Peach, Mario took a stroll to the neighboring kingdom, an arid desert country known as Sarasaland. While there he foiled the plans of the evil space invader, Tatanga, and rescued the kingdom's princess: Daisy.
Their meeting was even more hush-hush than Mario's brief stint with Pauline, and Daisy disappeared after just one gray appearance in Super Mario Land. What happened between the two has never really been disclosed, but after being saved by a giant, purple alien, we're betting that "innocent" kiss wasn't the stache master's only reward.
Unlike Daniella, Daisy has returned to many titles in the Mario series, becoming one of the more prominent characters in the spin-offs. In fact, she's appeared in so many spin-off titles that she has nearly adopted her tennis uniform as her main outfit, over the classical ballgown she used to wear.
Daisy is energetic by nature, and she has more than a hint of tomboy in her. Despite her adventurous and bold attitude, she knows how to get the men to do her bidding, and she even manipulated the Millennium Star in Mario Party 3 using her womanly wiles. Though this charm was originally far more innocent, we've now seen that Daisy is more than just a bit of a tease.
Despite her fling with Mario, Daisy and Peach seem to be the best of friends, and often make public appearances together. They work well as a team, and even seem to share some of the same abilities. Daisy has also been seen with Luigi, acting a little more friendly with he than most others. While Mario has managed to bury the past and stick with just one princess, Luigi is still cleaning up his sloppy seconds.
But I don't think he minds.
Princess Peach
Ah, Princess Peach. This girl's got such a fanbase, I doubt this portion is even necessary. Still, I must do all of Mario's lady friends injustice. Princess Peach has been Mario's longest running relationship, having lasted almost thirty years, despite the plumbers adventurous pipes in the early phases of the relationship. Something about this Princess just keeps Mario (and almost all male gamers) shootin' his fireballs, and it doesn't look like he's giving it up.
And that's not a problem!
Of all of Mario's mistresses, Princess Peach is the most capable. Despite being the girliest and most pampered of them all, she has continuously proven to be a skilled cleric and mage, and all around combatant. She's assisted Mario in two RPGs, went several rounds with Wart, and regularly beats the shit out of Nintendo's other all-stars in Super Smash Bros.. On top of all this, Peach has also been the star of her own title, Super Princess Peach, where she rescued Mario, Luigi, and Toad from Bowser with the aid of a talking umbrella. Even as baby Princess Peach was showing off her zest, helping the many Yoshis rescue the babies kidnapped by Kamek. Shown to be one of the Seven Star Children (which Daisy was not, which makes her the only "baby" character to not be a Star Child), Peach is predestined to be intertwined in Mario's future endeavors for a long time to come.
Welcome one and all to the very first Neglected Characters post. These sections will be dedicated to characters from movies, video games, comics, anything really, that had potential, have potential, or stand out to me for one reason or another, that have been for the most part forgotten by their respective publishers. The main purpose of these article is merely for entertainment and those who like the whole "lost characters" thing. If enough interest is raised in one character or another, perhaps the publishers will choose to use those characters in some project, but persuading them to do so is not the intent of this series.
This time we'll be taking a brief look at one of Mario's many lost characters...
ALEX
Mario Tennis (2000, GBC/N64)
To the dismay of many, Mario Tennis on the Game Boy Color didn't star the titular plumber, but had a story that focused on one of two player characters: if you chose to climb the ranks as a female, you got to play as Nina. If you chose to be a male, you ended up in control of Alex.
Alex can best be described as the tennis-playing equivalent to Ash Ketchum. He's introduced as the new kid on the block, just hitting puberty and yet he somehow manages to climb the ranks and take out the best of the best, becoming the champion of both Earth and the Mushroom Kingdom.
While I'm not sure of Alex's role in the sequel game, Mario Tennis: Power Tour, I know that he isn't the main player character. However he still appears, I'm just not sure quite what for. Despite this, Alex stands as an especially notable character in the Mario series because the development of his story, and the entire setting of the Mario Tennis series, expands the Mario universe in ways that otherwise wouldn't be known.
Mario Tennis: Power Tour shows a connection between the Mushroom Kingdom and Earth, however the worlds are considered separate realms or something of that sort. This might be typical fare to those who still believed that the Mario Bros. were a pair of Brooklyn plumbers, but to any of the thousands of people who were completely confused by Yoshi's Island, Mario & Luigi: Partners in Time, and any game featuring Baby Mario, this actually presents a few dozen possible and plausible explanations for the plumbers return to the Mushroom Kingdom.
Because the Game Boy counterparts of the Mario Tennis series focus on a completely separate set of characters, and develops those characters between the two games, they don't really feel like Mario games. There are some appearances by Donkey Kong and Princess Peach among a few other of the big name Mario characters, but the games feel like their own little micro series, and I think that's what they were meant to be. The Mario Tennis games seem more like Camelot's attempt at creating a tennis IP with actual development and character history, but were too afraid to market it without the fame of another character. It's actually a shame that these characters and this universe won't continue without the aid of Mario, and that they'll probably never see any form of home console release... Except for Alex.
Yes, back to the character whom spawned this post. Alex is the most significant of these Mario Tennis original characters because he is one of only four original characters to go toe-to-toe with a proper set of the Mario series roster in complete three-dimensional goodness. Granted, he was only in sixty-four bits, but a console appearance is a console appearance. He's also one of only two characters to be playable in multiple games in the series. The other being his counterpart, Nina.
Furthering the similarities between Alex and Ash, Mario Tennis was one of the few games on the Nintendo 64 that could make use of the Game Boy Transfer Pack. If the Game Boy Color version of Mario Tennis was inserted into the pack, the player had the opportunity to unlock six unique courts depending on their progress in the GBC title. They could also transfer in four characters: Alex, his partner Harry, Nina, and her doubles partner Kate. These characters, the only Mario Tennis original characters to enter a main console, were armed with their stats from the GBC game, meaning their abilities could be enhanced through playing.
Though Alex is often overlooked even by the most hardcore of the hardcore, he's had three overall appearances, making him among the most commonly used "insignificant" Mario character. While it seems that these characters were phased out of existence only moments after they were born, there's still time to bring them back, and there's still histories to explore, and with the lack of a proper Mario Tennis title for the Nintendo Wii, maybe they'll show up in the future.
As I talked about yesterday, of all days, Capcom has been letting it slip that they've been planning some kind of remastered edition of their latest Marvel vs Capcom 3. Today I woke up to discover that the rumors were not only true, but that Capcom had released a series of trailers to accompany them. The trailers show off four characters, one of which actually made my list of Capcom characters I wanted to see. I won't spoil the surprise, so have a yourself a gander.
That's right. Firebrand actually made the cut. I'm a little disappointed they went with a more cartoonish approach to his character, but he can still look pretty menacing at times, so I'm okay with it. He'll be taking on the likes of Ghost Rider, Hawkeye, and Strider Hiryu when Ultimate Marvel vs Capcom 3 hits shelves. There's still more characters to come, as Capcom has promised us twelve new characters and a roster of fifty, meaning that Shuma Gorath and Jill Valentine are not being counted among the "new" roster. New game modes, such as a spectator mode, and a few rebalancing updates are also going to be part of the package.
With eight characters left and the choices already looking good, I can't wait to see how this develops. Ultimate Marvel vs Capcom 3 will be showing up in stores on November 15, just in time to add it to your already extensive Christmas list, at a price point of $39.99.
A Super Smash Bros. sequel has pretty much been confirmed to at least be in pre-production for the Nintendo's upcoming Wii U console, and while without a trailer the rabid character craze hasn't had a chance to transform the internet into a cesspool of bubbling lolita witch fans (Ashley, I love you), I am still pretty damned hyped, and spend a good portion of one day a week (every hour of every day) fantasizing about just who is going to make the cut. Out of all the possible Nintendo characters there are, these are the five that I would choose if I were on the production team.
1. Villager
The Villagers from Animal Crossing were the original Mii, and they did it a hundred times better. Even back in the old and archaic days of the GameCube, your Villager could change its clothes, which is really more than can be said for any of the Miis at all in the history of ever. The DS added changeable hats and hairstyles, and I'm pretty sure Animal Crossing: City Folk on the Wii finally let you put on different pants and shoes, but I never actually bought that one. Really, Miis should be completely scrapped in favor of using a player's Villager, because they already have an iconic image, and they're already customizable enough to rival with Microsoft's Avatars.
That iconic look the Villagers have is one of the main reasons they should show up in a future Smash Bros. title. Not to mention their immediate arsenal includes axes, shovels, slingshots, fishing rods, and fifteen random pieces of furniture ranging from sofas to urinals, and you've got someone who can literally bury the competition. The Animal Crossing franchise has already proven popular enough to warrant receiving its own stage in Super Smash Bros.: Brawl, and its fanbase really hasn't shrunk. This series is one of Nintendo's big hitters, and it deserves a chance to shine with the best of them.
Apparently Google doesn't like the GCN male, so have a Wild World.
2. Balloon Fighter
Both Melee and Brawl have added two very specific character types to the roster: a reimagined classic character, and a kind of "wtf" Nintendo-historic character. Melee brought us a freshly redimensioned pair of Ice Climbers, as well as the paper-flat Mr. Game & Watch, while Brawl pimped out Pit, and weaponized everybody's robotic buddy, ROB. The only game in the trilogy to not feature a character of these types was the first one way back on the N64, and arguably, all of the characters were "classic" characters, and Ness and Captain Falcon were both very "wtf."
Since Melee, Sakurai has teased us with the prospect of including the famous Balloon Fighter, sometimes known as the Balloonist, to the series, and almost did just that but couldn't due to some physics issues. We've now had arguably two console generations pass by, and it's pretty certain that these issues can be easily worked out. I've already stated how Balloon Fight is one of my favorite retro games, and it's far less obscure than Mach Rider or even Joy Mech Fight, making the Balloon Fighter the perfect face to represent Nintendo's retro library.
Maybe he's actually "Lollipop Fighter." I'm not quite sure.
3. Meowth
Like the Balloon Fighter, Meowth had actually been scheduled to debut as a player character in a previous Smash Bros. title, though his claim to fame was set to be the original Super Smash Bros. on the Nintendo 64. Unfortunately he, alongside King Dedede, Peach, Bowser, and Pit, were removed from the title probably because the team was running out of time, which seems to be a common factor in not giving us enough Smash. This is a hint for Nintendo to finally suck it up and permit DLC.
All of those characters actually did make it into the series, eventually, and it's about time for Meowth to do the same. While the character isn't quite as recognizable as he was back in the day, he is still one of the more iconic Pokemon in the franchise, and he hasn't been traded off of Team Rocket's roster in the anime, effectively appearing in nearly every episode of the 700 episode series, and having infinitely more character development and depth than Pikachu. Meowth has appeared as a summonable Pokemon in both Super Smash Bros. and Super Smash Bros.: Brawl, and I think it's time we finally got to use Pay Day ourselves.
So long side character, hello spotlight!
4. KOS-MOS
KOS-MOS is the figurehead of Monolith Soft's Xenosaga trilogy, originally published by Namco, and was popular enough to receive cameos in nearly every other game Namco published at the time, such as: Namco x Capcom, Soul Calibur III, and Tales of Hearts. However, in 2007, Nintendo bought a large portion of Namco's interest in the developers, and Monolith became a first-party developer in the name of the Big N. They took the Xenosaga franchise along for the ride, releasing a retelling of the first two Xenosaga episodes on the Nintendo DS.
KOS-MOS isn't just the figurehead of the Xenosaga franchise, however. She's probably right up there with Square-Enix's Cloud Strife for recognizable RPG characters, and Master Chief for representing the video game industry's SciFi genre. KOS-MOS is a beautiful, yet seemingly heartless, android with a very large assortment of weapons, and inhuman strength and stamina. While she's new in the Nintendo break room, her reputation will undoubtedly proceed her, and she really deserves the opportunity to prove that she's right where she belongs.
What draws your attention more? The slight panty shot, or the pair of insane Gatling guns marching towards you? ...It was the panties, wasn't it?
5. Diskun
Remember how earlier I mentioned that the Smash Bros. franchise always adds a "wtf" character? Well here's mine. Aside from Captain N, Nintendo's history is really running out of oddball characters that don't have a direct starring role or identity, but Diskun is certainly a more colorful character than ROB. American audiences probably won't know him unless they're total nerds or they unlocked his trophy in Super Smash Bros. Melee, but he should be familiar to any Japanese family who owned a Famicom Disk System. That should be about four million of you.
Diskun hasn't actually appeared in games outside of very, very minor cameo roles, but he is a fondly remembered part of Nintendo's history, and he really brings a unique image to the game. Not to mention that he's wildly popular and merchandise featuring the character typically sells like hotcakes. Also, he's probably some kind of nerdy cousin to Domo-Kun.
Definitely.
Bonus Character:
Ditto
Why am I considering Ditto a "bonus" sixth character, and why does he get to break the rules of the list anyways? Because Ditto has technically already been playable in a previous Smash Bros. game. What the hell am I talking about? Have a look for yourself:
Photoshop is completely uninvolved with the image you just saw. In certain match types of Melee's Tournament Mode, holding down L+R and pressing A while choosing your character will replace the icon with Ditto, and the name with "Random," which is a hell of a lot better than that obnoxious white box Brawl tried to get away with.
That one.
Adding Ditto in basically the same exact role he already had would be a great way for Nintendo to make the roster feel a little more full, and add a tiny bit of replay to the game, as it would give us about three new trophies to collect. If some players really aren't convinced that he's enough of a character, tack on that goofy ass face from the anime.
While I haven't had the opportunity to try out Capcom's latest superhero smash hit (I have no money, you see) I know plenty of people have been Hulking out on zombie hunters and midget knights the world over. And I also happen to know that most of these people are pretty disappointed at the slight roster they were given as a follow-up to MvC2's fifty character select screen. Many of these people were under the impression that Jill Valentine and Shuma Gorath wouldn't be the only two characters to enter the land of downloadable content, but it looks like they may have been wrong.
Rumors, and I'll repeat that, rumors are now circulating that what had at one time been planned to be DLC is now going to become Ultimate Marvel vs. Capcom, an enhanced port of the game that is said to hit shelves at $39.99, as opposed to the full price. This is in the same spirit as Capcom's other return fighter, Street Fighter IV, which got a "Super" port hardly a year later.
What everyone thinks Capcom looks like.
So, naturally, there is an enormous shit storm blasting everyone in the face the second they mention the prospect of Ultimate Marvel vs Capcom 3. This is because people really aren't taking the time to let the real figures sink in. Instead of waiting around for them to get it straight, I'll just tell them in simple terms.
Ultimate Marvel vs Capcom 3 would save you money.
Yeah, that's right. Buying into this whole "updated port" nonsense will save you more money than if you were to buy all of that additional content in downloadable form. As it stands now, Capcom is releasing each character at a price point of 400 Microsoft Points, that's five dollars for those of you who aren't so savvy in bull shit.
If the rumors are to be believed, and any further announcement of a UMvC3 would say that they are, then the game will come with ten entirely new characters, plus the two characters who were previously released as special DLC for the first version of the game. If you were to buy these characters as DLC, you'd be dishing out a total of sixty dollars for new content, as opposed to the $39.99 you'll be charged instead. You will actually save twenty dollars and one cent if Capcom were to release an "Ultimate" upgraded version in stores. There would probably also be significant balancing tweaks that would make some characters be less of an asshole.
But not all...
Of course there are always some players who felt as though they were magically entitled to an ungodly number of characters in the first edition of MvC3, and bitch about how thirty-six characters wasn't enough for them and that the game was shit because of it. These people are all morons who don't understand that they were lucky enough to get the game in the first place, let alone as many characters as they did. Capcom was not recycling programming and sprites for this one, so you idiots need to seriously shut up.
To everybody else: I hope you now understand that an "Ultimate" edition will actually be less costly to you in the short run.
Namco unveiled not long ago that because of overwhelming fan reaction (read: a ton of whining) that there will, in fact be a Soul Calibur V, which will actually be the eighth title in the Soul Calibur/Soul Edge franchise. At first fans were ecstatic, even though many of them were disappointed with2008's Soul Calibur IV for no real reason. Of course, shortly after the title was introduced, loyalists were bitching yet again. And, alright, maybe this time they have a bit of a reason.
Wait a minute. That girl with the panty shot. She looks like Cassandra, sounds like Talim, but she isn't either. What the hell is this nonsense? That nonsense was Pyrrha, and it's anyone's guess as to how that's pronounced. She's Sophitia's daughter, and that young cad she was dueling with was none other than her brother: Patroklos.
"Hang on," I hear you say. "They're putting in two more sword and shield characters? Isn't three enough?" Well, yes and no. See, Patroklos and Pyrrha (oh Pyrrha, you poor soul. Do you know of Soul Calibur's legacy in the hentai community?) are actually exact clones of their mother and aunt respectively. The idea is that Sophitia and Cassandra, by this time, have taken to the old saying and aged like milk, no longer taking up the sword to banish evil from the lands of Greece.
Some of you out there are raging, and most of you are going "Who gives a shit?" I'm in the camp that gives a shit but is not raging. See, there's two camps of ragers in this situation. One camp is pissed off that they won't get to play as their favorite bouncing breasts, the other camp is pissed that Namco is recycling weapon styles that have already been used by other characters.
I really don't see the problem here.
I'm in the camp that realizes that the leap forward in time was needed if they were going to continue telling stories set in the Soul Calibur universe, because we'd already had four or five games in a row about Siegfried and Nightmare, and that Yin Yang shit was getting really old. Even with Yoda around to spice things up a little bit (or Vader, if you had a PS3 or five bucks to just throw around.)
However, where fighting games are concerned, there is an enormous competitive market. The players who spend literal months of their lives mastering the combos and skills of a particular fighter would feel like deeply sodomized fools if their character of choice were to be removed from the sequels. That'd be like holding a martial arts tournament, but banning karate. The compromise was to introduce new characters that retain the fighting styles their ancestors had. This allows the creative team to build an entirely new plot and story arc, while avoiding the wrath of competitive gamers. A wrath that can be devestating to some developers (and Namco is basically sitting in a kettle as it is. Thanks a lot, economy. Stealing my Tales series from me.)
Some fans out there still won't be able to appreciate the changes going on in the series, and I'll admit, I was a little... unsure of what to make about the whole situation at first. Ultimately I came to the conclusion that introducing a new, yet related, roster is better than morphing the existing characters into new ones for the sake of continuing the brand. I commend Namco on the bold move of inventing a new generation of warrior.
Some companies still don't get it.
And since the programming for these characters is almost entirely there already, I highly doubt that we'll be missing out on new fighting styles. That is, after all, what makes up the genre, and Namco knows this. One of the reasons for advancing the plot so far forward was to allow for the invention of new weapons and weapons styles. Additionally, with DLC finally becoming a little more standard and a little more governed, it's a pretty good possibility that the old characters will return (non-canon, of course) for those who really do appreciate them. Younger costumes for all of the aged characters as well.
What I find equally as exciting as getting to know these new characters is the confirmed addition of guest characters, in true Soul Calibur fashion. While I doubt we'll see the return of Link due to a lack of Wii or Wii U release, Daishi Odashima has mentioned something about wanting to use characters from the Final Fantasy franchise. But before you start fantasizing about Cloud swapping blows with Siegfried, and Yuffie slamming Pyrrha into a puddle of mud, let me remind you that Square-Enix is a pain in the ass to work with, and even had a huge hand in delaying Super Smash Bros.: Brawl. So at this point, there's really no way of figuring out who we'll see throwing down with out favorite iron clad heroes.
As both a collector and a player, it's really sad to see pieces of a franchise's history disappear to the tides of time. I'm not even talking about things like the Sega GameGear, the GameBoy Micro, or the McDonald's toy lines. Not directly, anyways. What I'm talking about are some of the lesser games, the children's novels, the DIC animated cartoons, and the comic books. All of these little pieces of history in the evolution of a franchise, all of them are stories that probably won't see a generation outside of the one they were made in. With the usual exception of our good friends the Pirates, but even they don't seem to have everything.
Seriously, has anybody under twenty even seen this book?
These stories, poorly written as they may have been, were all a part of the evolution of the legacy of franchise. When you talk about Sonic the Hedgehog, someone is eventually going to mention the name "Princess Sally." Once you're talking about her, you're talking about the Freedom Fighters, and then you eventually hear the question "How many Freedom Fighter groups were there?" Having watched the old series, you'll know there's at least one other group of Freedom Fighters, but books like the one above, Fortress of Fear, expand further on the ideas of the universe as a whole, and introduce several other Freedom Fighter groups. This bit of legacy will eventually be lost, and it's going to be sad watching it disappear. It is sad watching it disappear.
And it's not just Sonic the Hedgehog who's losing his mythos. Super Mario, Link, Garfield, and even Ronald McDonald have all been subject to various pieces of companion merchandising over the years, and all of them are left to the realm of nostalgic sixth grade memories. This is a royal shame. The characters of our fiction will be all that remains of our civilization as the ages pass. They will become the legends and fables of tomorrow. Are we really going to watch that disappear? Are we going to allow the things we grew up on to become dust in the distant corners of our memories?
So some of the material might not be the best thing ever produced, but it really doesn't deserve to fall into obscurity. Especially not in the current age, when it's nearly costless to create digital copies of this material and release it on platforms such as Amazon Kindle, iTunes, and in the case of the many, many media games, Steam. Not only would this be a relatively riskless way of introducing the media to a new audience, it would also be a great way for companies to make a little extra money off of existing material. There's really no reason not to, and it would save a lot of materials from rotting in the land of nostalgia hell.
One of the largest reasons I hate to see this material disappear is that, as a creator, I know what it's like to have something of yours just whisked away in the face of something new. Even if it isn't the creator's best work, there was at least a minimal effort put into creating it, and I feel like the entertainment industry is committing a great disservice to the creators of the content by burying it for all eternity.
2 Stupid Dogs is one of those shows that you remember when you see it, or when you hear it from another room, but if it isn't immediate in front of you, it becomes a mute blur of unshaded color in the memory of your childhood babysat-by-the-television days.
With designs this creative, I can't imagine how I could have forgotten!
Of course, even when you remember exactly what characters we're talking about, you can't really remember much about the show. You remember something along the lines of "the little yapper with the high pitched voice accompanied by his dimwitted sidekick with no eyes." Well, that's a pretty good summary if you intend on describing a show that wanted to be Ren and Stimpy, and you could make a convincing argument that that's what this show is, but it really doesn't do a whole lot of justice.
2 Stupid Dogs follows the old format of multiple short cartoons in a half-hour period, in this case three shorts. The shorts are rather quiet and calm, and far more about observing everything going on around the dogs than directly to them, and it's probably this aspect that makes them so hard to remember for children who actually grew up watching them. And to be fair, while the shorts are chuckle worthy, there really isn't a whole lot of reason to bother remembering them. Unless you're a toonophile.
Between the two dogs shorts is a short centered around Secret Squirrel, a character who original appeared alongside Atom Ant in the 1960's. The segment is called Super Secret Secret Squirrel and features the crime fighter facing off against some new enemies, always with the assistance of his pal Morocco Mole. These cartoons have the same personality as the rest of 2 Stupid Dogs, and even seem to satirize the era from which they originated.
Ultimately, while the reemergence of the program won't make any waves with audiences, I'm glad to see that it hasn't been lost to the lands of obscure cartoons.
Yesterday I made a list of Marvel characters I wanted to see bring home the download cake, so today we'll be taking a look at five of my favorite Capcom characters. The characters presented here have never appeared in a Marvel vs Capcom title, though a few of them may have crossed paths with SNK's Terry Bogard a time or two.
1. Sheva Alomar
Well, it looks like they've totally mixed things up with Jill, even going so far as to give her that bullshit Nina Wiiliams look from RE5, and in the process actually took a fighting style out of their game. Giving another female character from the festering streets of Resident Evil Jill's old move set would partially rectify this situation, and despite my love for Leon Kennedy, I'd rather see an old, but fixed, play style return. There were quite a few choices to go with here. Essentially any female player character from the franchise would have worked, but I'm going with Sheva for a couple of reasons. To start with, she's the most relevant, having appeared in high-scoring Resident Evil 5. She also provides a positive example for, wait for it, a black female character. In video games. She's actually fairly ground breaking in that regard, because I really can't think of another strong black female lead that originated in a video game. Sheva also has the arsenal needed to mimic Jill's old moves, and the Plagas to spice things up a little bit.
Holding guns makes me sexeh.
2. Firebrand
Firebrand is a member of the Red Arremer class of demons that made their claim to fame in the Ghosts 'n Goblins franchise, which also happens to be the birthplace of Arthur, who has already been swapping blows with Captain America for a few months. The demons proved to be so popular that they were given a spin-off series known as Gargoyle's Quest which starred a particular Red Arremer named Firebrand, whom happened to possess abilities beyond the usual Red Arremer classes. Red Arremer's are quite famous creatures, and their design can be easily recognized by even casual gamers. They usually take the form of cameos in the Capcom vs. franchise, but one was actually a playable character in SNK vs Capcom: SVC Chaos. Previous crossovers and legacy aside, Firebrand just looks badass. He's like a demonic version of Sauron, and can probably rip Parker's head off faster than Quicksilver could blink. Also, his name is just badass. Say it with me. Firebrand.
Good. Now chant and bow.
3. Vile
Vile has blasted the shit out of Mega Man X on more than one occasion, and he's even been playable in a 3D remake of the original Mega Man X. Vile is essentially the X franchise equivalent to Bass, much like X is the original Mega Man and Zero is some form of Proto Man. There doesn't seem to be a Roll X, but I guess Cinnamon counts. Anyways, Vile. Vile, kind of looking like Boba Fett and just as badass, is the only known reploid with the ability to go maverick of his own volition, which is really just a fancy way of saying "he actually thinks for himself and we don't like it when he does." He has a psyche unstable enough to rival Deadpool, and his sole motivation is to prove that he's the best there is. If you get between him and X, you're bound to get your penguinny ass blown to pieces. I've always been a huge fan of Vile ever since he first beat me into submission at the beginning of Mega Man X, back in the days of my youth when I thought his shoulder cannon was some kind of weird nose. The reason I've picked Vile to be another rep for the Mega Man franchise who isn't Mega Man is because I feel the franchise needs a little more variety going out into the crossover titles, and Vile is one of the more memorable characters the games have to offer. This really was a difficult choice, because if I could convince Capcom to give me some Chill Penguin DLC, you bet I frikken would.
X, I am your prototype!
4. Saki
Saki has previously showed up in Marvel vs Capcom 2, but as she was only an assist character, she doesn't fall under the exemption of previous characters. Where she has appeared as a playable fighter was in the Wii's Tatsunoko vs Capcom where she was one of my favorite characters to play as, having a knock back and blast gameplay that was really fun to use. She might not fit the bill exactly in terms of visuals, but it really wouldn't be too hard to blend her into the ink and pen styled graphics, especially considering they managed to make Viewtiful Joe work out okay. Saki seems to have a few fans inside the company itself, as she frequently shows up in crossover titles despite not really being known as a character.
My advice? Go on the date.
5. Cleric
Saving the unlikeliest for last, I'd like to introduce everybody to the Cleric, one of the five warriors who battled the dragon king Gildiss to save the land of Malus way back in 1991 in a little-known game called The King of Dragons. I was the fortunate and proud owner of the SNES port of the game, and I played it relentlessly (it's a miracle the thing still works.) Though I never played as the Cleric, often preferring the all-powerful Wizard, the Cleric was the character that managed to stick with me, visually, for so many years. I kind of see him as the game's figurehead hero. I also think he provides some unique opportunities for a versus character. For instance, the nature of the Cleric is that he's large, clunky, and slow, but he has some heavy attacks. That's fine, but if he can't get around, he'll get wasted. Except for that enormous shield he lugs into battle with him. That, coupled with his amazingly quick counters would provide for some interesting battles. The Cleric also has command over the second most powerful magic spells in the game, which ties itself nicely for making this guy stand out amongst the other big tough guys that pervade the genre.
Marvel vs Capcom 3 has been out long enough that the price is beginning to drop, and there still isn't any sign of downloadable content showing up on the XBLA servers. However, do not lose hope, do not despair. Capcom has several times stated that MvC3 is not abandoned. They have promised us either DLC or an updated Super version, akin to what they've done with Super Street Fighter IV. This news got me all kinds of excited again, fantasizing about all sorts of dream match ups, ridiculous combos, and spectacular specials that some of my favorite characters could pull off in glorious, glorious 3D. To work out some of my insane juices, here's a list of the top five Marvel characters I want to see make the next batch of MvC all-stars.
1. Karolina Dean
Karolina might not have the most heroic name, and she may not be the toughest hitter on Marvel's team, but she's got all the flair needed to make an impression. Belonging to an alien race known as the Majesdanians, Karolina's skin can absorb solar energy to the extent where her body cannot fully contain it. Through training and practice, Karolina has learned to master the ability of flight, as well as the ability to unleash several forms of solar radiated energy blasts. These skills, coupled with the fact that Karolina can create nearly indestructible energy shields, has made her an important player in the Runaways.
Go ahead and tell me she wouldn't look beauitful. You know you're lying.
2. Nightcrawler
Nightcrawler has been a pretty popular character ever since his first introduction 1975. Despite his death in recent issues, Kurt still lives strong in the hearts of many, and it's not impossible to believe that he could appear given the alternate continuity designation of the MvC franchise. Nightcrawler has a surprising lot to bring the table than just a unique looking character. The gargoyle-esque superhero has the ability to teleport, a process which is otherwise known as "bamfing." This, coupled with his odd physiology which allows him to perform inhuman acrobatic feats, would make Nightcrawler one of the more original characters on the roster. Winding up a punch and then teleporting behind your opponent to deliver the attack? The gameplay possibilities with Nightcrawler are practically endless.
3. Howard the Duck
I can hear many of you laughing, and some of you clicking frantically at the "back" button on your browser, but back in his day, Howard was a pretty popular duck. So popular, in fact, that he was one of the first Marvel properties to star in a feature film. While some of the Duck's recent adventures have done a number on his concept and design, he still proves to be a cult favorite and is among one of the highest requested characters to appear in any Marvel game. Howard brings a bit of humor to the game, being a good candidate for the joke type of character that Capcom is such an enormous fan of, while also presenting a lot of opportunities for being a serious combatant. Howard is a master of the little known martial art Quak-Fu, which he has employed to defeat several enemies. Due to Howard being dragged through the Nexus of All Realities, he has gained considerable mystical abilities, to the point of being able to summon a fourth Eye of Aamotto and generate several other of Dr. Strange's famous weaponry, with Strange himself even remarking that Howard has the potential to become the next Sorcerer Supreme.
Like Uncle Scrooge, but cooler.
4. Doctor Octopus
Doc Ock has been one of Spider-Man's most famous arch-nemesi, and one of the most dangerous. Ock has been featured in what is regularly considered the best superhero film of all time, a role which skyrocketed his popularity well beyond the staggering level it already had. The good doctor has continuously proven to be extremely dangerous, and even formed the original Sinister Six, a team which nearly crushed our famed arachned hero. Doctor Octopus doesn't possess any superpowers of his own, but his four robotic tentacles are tough enough to put a dent in Cap's shield, and he's even used them to beat the Hulk into submission and tear apart Iron Man's armor. Brutally beating on alcoholics and whining scientists isn't the only reason Doc should show his face in Marvel's greatest display of combatants. The very source of his powers, the robotic harness he wears, presents Capcom with several hundred interesting possibilities. There is literally an endless number of ways for Ock to utilize that thing in combat, and even just showing off a few of them would make for one of the most diverse characters this side of the arcade.
Galactus is about to take some Megavitamins.
5. Daredevil
Daredevil might not possess super strength or super speed, but he's nearly as agile as Spider-Man, and his super senses allow him to dodge bullets, if only by a few centimetres. Ben Affleck gave this guy a reputation he didn't really deserve (and to be fair, that movie really wasn't terrible. Anything with Evanescence deserves to be watched at least once), but he's been Marvel's answer to Batman for a long time. Which makes sense when you consider that Frank Miller is responsible for the best runs in both series. Daredevil is a lawyer, much like She-Hulk, and fights in the name of the law when the police won't (though he's not going nearly as far as the Punisher... Who isn't on this list, sorry guys.) Daredevil is trained in several formed of martial arts, and was the son of a professional boxer, so he's a brute by nature, and he shows it off by instilling fear in the hearts of his enemies. While he isn't an A-List hero, Daredevil regularly teams up with them, and puts criminals such as the Kingpin in their place.
Sony unveiled their latest set of nonsense on Thursday, citing the recent PlayStation cracking wave and the endeavors of Lulzsec as justification for ripping off their customers yet again. This time, however, instead of asking the unfortunate photographers who employ the use of their cameras to by Sony-specific memory cards, they're asking anybody who plays video games to play online using a special code that unlocks online multiplayer for a specific game for your console only.
This is probably also Sony's answer to GameStop, which has been called a blasphemous stain on the entire industry for some time, due in large part to the fact that developers and publishers receive no profit from resale. Not like the entertainment industry hasn't been doing this for years.
Books now come with digitized lighters that detect when you intend on trading them in.
The special code that makes Left 4 Dead worth owning will come packaged with the game, so you don't really have to worry about that if you're buying it new. If you've decided to buy the game from Amazon, eBay, GameStop, or your father's brother's nephew's cousin's former roommate, you'll have to shell out an additional ten bucks to $ony themselves if you want the access code to play the game online. There's no word yet on how they'll handle this, but my bet is that it's going to involve a lot of waiting. They could at least put the codes on PSN and pop up when you put the game in.
It's really not too big of a deal. Games that don't have a solid offline campaign really aren't worth the money, with a few special exceptions, and Sony has said that the Pass system will only affect online play. The real bug here is that games these days are ten dollars more than what they were five years ago, and fifty dollars was already a heft sum of money to be shelling out for a few pixels and a light gun. If you want to play online, and you happened to buy the game from a retailer who follows a "test first" policy (or GameStop, who seems to think they can open brand new games, shove stickers all over the inserts, and scratch the disc shoving it into a sleeve) then you're now seventy dollars out for just one game.
Luckily...
Probably even more important than any of that, however, is that this whole "pass" system is going to throw a knife in one of the oldest and most sacred traditions of video games: letting your best friend borrow your shit. Growing up, swapping games was probably one of the greatest things in the world. I mean, me and my buddy always swapped the same two games: my Chip 'n' Dale Rescue Rangers for his Donkey Kong Classics. These two games were both on the NES, for those of you too young to know what I'm talking about. It was great knowing you were playing a game that was wrapped tightly by trust and camraderie. There was also the excitement of meeting on the playground the next down and swapping secrets you discovered that the game's actual owner didn't know about, like how to stop the water from flowing in the pub.
Yeah, I couldn't figure this out...
Granted, I'm jumping the gun a little bit because Sony hasn't told us exactly how this system is going to work, and I'm sure they probably haven't ironed it all out yet themselves. However, if the system works as they're pitching it now, it could be the worst thing to happen to gaming since, I dunno, since E.T.. What do you guys think?
I don't know if anybody else has noticed, but shoes have seemingly taken over Facebook. Everywhere you turn, somebody has been tagged in a picture by one of their friends, but is the picture of them? Nope, it's of a pair of sexy, cheetah-print heels. Naturally the offending account is one of your friends, who must have activated an app of some sort and handed over the keys to their account while they were at it.
Sims Lite: Now with 50% more identity theft!
The worst part is that the app seems to hide the shoes somewhere on your account, making it impossibly difficult to find the offending picture and remove it before all of your friends and close family remove you. And they will, because people have a much easier time cussing at you for supposedly being a spambot than for rationally thinking "well, maybe they clicked something stupid."
Unfortunately it looks like there isn't really a direct connection between registering for any apps and getting your account hijacked by Nike's cyberterrorism division. Shoes can show up in your photo albums seemingly at any time with no warning or interaction with any other apps, barging through the doors of your password to piss off your entire list of friends. The only consistent connection between being a living billboard for Reebok seems to be being tagged in one of your friend's pictures. When your innocent and somewhat curious mind thinks "What picture of me could Tommy have taken? We haven't hung out in years! We've hardly even spoken since he snatched up my daughter and ran off to Iraq." and you, you poor, misguided soul, you, happens to click on the notification and find yourself visually assaulted by a Japanese woman's tiny feet blistering inside a pair of aquamarine clogs, you may be putting yourself at risk for toe cramps. The only conclusion I've got is that the shoes are spreading like some kind of crazy disease.
Stay away! I wear flops!
Luckily my rudimentary (that's elementary school for rude people) knowledge of web coding tells me that demonic shoe pictures isn't actually possible, at least not on the system Facebook has available to its users. So we should all be safe from platforms that we simply can't afford. Unless, of course, Facebook is in on the whole thing. Then we might as well all just move to Twitter.
In the long, long history of video games with half of a plot, there have been hundreds among larger numbered hundreds of video game bad guys. Some of these scoundrels have risen to fame in both the nerd circles, and the public as a whole, even spinning off into their own mistold tales. Many, however, fall into the brink of obscurity, waiting for a developer with his job on the rocks to pull out all the stops and revive them. This list is a nod to these villains, for who they were, who they should be, and the franchises that would be a whole lot better if they were to return.
1. Majora's Mask
Majora's Mask was the main antagonist of the Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask for the Nintendo 64, the only game before Twilight Princess that stood against Ocarina of Time in the bloody battles between Zelda fans for the best game ever made (I stand firmly in the Majora's Mask camp, but that's irrelevant to this post.) Majora's Mask is an ancient artifact of manifest evil that seems to be both home and captor of a tormented soul, seemingly forming its own demonic persona (the intent of which is to resurrect its dark creator.)
To do this, it molested a kid's face.
Some could convincingly argue that Majora's Mask isn't a "forgotten" villain, but remakes aside, its been missing in action for over a decade. Which is a shame, because the last time I checked, Ganon hadn't managed to crash the Moon into the planet. That's how much power this mask has. This mask has the power to bestow a nightmarish, grinning face onto an enormous hunk of space rock, seal four all-powerful deities inside tiny little masks, and send the space rock hurtling towards the planet. It can also create a breathable atmosphere on the Moon, so there's that.
What I'm saying is, this Mask is a powerful bastard. It's like the One Ring if the Ring could talk and fly around on its own. The mask can generate illusions, possess individuals from a distance, and even the most strong willed warriors can't help but succumb to the mask's desires once they happen to touch it. Which makes destroying it a bitch. Not only that, but as the Mask's power increases, it has the ability to begin manifesting itself in numerous physical bodies.
Oh fuck...
This mask is so powerful that Link, who has been saving the world from all sorts of demonic shit for centuries, had to pull a Goku if he even wanted to stand a chance. And this wasn't just any run of the mill Oracles of Ages Link. Oh no. This was the Link that had already defeated Ganon as the beast ripped down a castle and terrorized the country. Just imagine what would happen if Majora's Mask managed to latch itself onto the Holder of Power himself.
My sentiments exactly.
2. Giovanni
Giovanni should be a well known character to Pokefans of the 90's, but outside of remakes and a small cameo in HeartGold and SoulSilver, the true leader of Team Rocket hasn't been heard from in quite a while. And that's a little interesting considering the enigma this man was back when the Pokemon anime was the hottest shit on television. He was like a new, decidedly darker version of Inspector Gadget's Claw. Only a portion of his face was shown at any one time, while the rest was hidden by darkness, which created an overwhelming and still not understood feeling of dread, and left millions of hapless seven-year-olds wondering what this man looked like.
Maybe he should have stayed hidden...
While not a wholly original character, one cannot deny that Giovanni demands presence, and of all the suit-wearing mafia characters you've seen, his nearly cross-eyed and crumpled expression is going to be the one that sticks with you. Everything about him that at first glance screams "lame" or "poor design" becomes another fold in the quilt that is this man's well deserved legacy.
"What legacy?" I hear you ask. Well, even though Giovanni himself hasn't shown his face in anything new, his influence lives on. Let's start with the obvious fact that he was the financial backbone of the Mewtwo genetic experiments, and essentially the father to the most powerful, most deadly monster known to the Pokemon interpretation of Earth. This is a landmark in Pokescience. While the other professors are merely reviving dinosaurs and building Lego block ducks, Giovanni was birthing a superior species.
Not unlike this guy.
Giovanni's reach extends well beyond the scope of the first Generation, however. His cold, Persian-covered fingers wrap tightly around Generation II's throat. The most obvious evidence of this is the band of struggling Team Rocket grunts that hope to revive the organization by calling out to their fallen leader. Unfortunately their ambitions are crushed beneath the feet of yet another ten-year-old boy. Three years later and these guys still haven't evolved their Rattatas.
Also found in Generation II is one of the most despicable rivals featured in the Pokemon franchise: Silver. While Blue is pretty obnoxious and hard on his Pokemon, Silver is downright abusive, and most of his team has been stolen from other trainers. Oh, and he's Giovanni's son. That's right. The douchiest of all douche characters turns out to be the son of Pokemon's Al Capone.
How's dem apples? Oh yeah. I ate them.
3. Wizpig
Now this guy I bet you've genuinely never heard of. Not unless you're a hardcore Nintendonut, a racingnut, or, again, a child of the 90's. The 90's really was a good time for villains. Wizpig was the antagonist of Nintendo and Rareware's lovechild, Diddy Kong Racing for the N64. Though the game titles Diddy Kong, it actually has nothing to do with the Donkey Kong franchise outside of product placement (the same is to be said for Banjo the bear and Conker the squirrel, and also Timber the tiger, though that one never came to fruition.) The game actually revolves around Wizpig, an alien wizard who invades Timber's Island and places a gigantic statue of himself in the central "lobby" area, just to remind the players that he's watching their asses run around his playground, and they're only alive because they make him laugh.
Big Brother is watching... and breathing fire.
What's so bad about a giant talking pig? Well, to name one thing, he's already conquered his home world and turned it into some kind of twisted amusement park. So while Bowser struggles time and again to kidnap one measly kingdom, Wizpig has already crushed the fighting spirit of an entire planet. So, that's pretty bad.
He's also unimaginably powerful. This pig just descended from the heavens in his indestructible warship and stripped an all-powerful genie of most of his powers without breaking a sweat. This just shows that Wizpig has mastery of both science and magic, and he is effective at using both. He also brainwashes four gigantic beasts, and when the island's great champion arrives to challenge him, he laughs and turns him into a frog.
Still don't think I'm scary, bitch?
Really none of the heroes have an actual hope of defeating this guy. If it weren't for what can only be explained as him getting bored, Diddy and friends would have never even been able to defeat the first boss, let alone reach Wizpig's home world. Even after you leave his slow ass behind in a first race, he shows up at the party just to remind everyone that he's miles out of their league. And unlike in most cartoons where this happens, he doesn't end up humiliating himself and getting a face full of pie. Oh no. Because everyone there knows that he can disintegrate their ass in two seconds flat, and they book it like librarians.
4. Fang the Sniper
Ah, yes. Fang the Sniper, better known as Nack the Weasel in places that speak in English dialects, is one of the few Sonic the Hedgehog antagonists with no relation to Dr. Eggman (also known as Dr. Robotnik to those of you who... just reread it.) Fang, so called because of his enormous canine, is a vicious bounty and treasure hunter who actually hails from the Special Zone, being the first and only character to natively exist in that acid trip.
"Get outta my house!"
That's not the only first Fang brought to the table. Eleven years before Shadow the Hedgehog ran off pretending to be the Punisher, Fang was popping caps in Sonic's furry, blue ass. He was also riding motorcycles, so really "Shadow the Hedgehog" should have been called "the Return of Fang the Sniper"... but then it sucked, so we're all happy it wasn't.
Fang had a short history of only three games, none of which were popular or mainstream, but the impression he's made on the franchise has managed to transcend time and age. This is probably due in large part to Archie's Sonic the Hedgehog monthly comic series, which has managed to keep the character fresh and relevant despite Sega having practically disowned him.
However, Fang's continued popularity might stem from a few other facts more directly related to the video game universe. For starters, he's a major antagonist who had absolutely no relation to Eggman. He was not built by Eggman, hired by Eggman, released by Eggman, tricked by Eggman, or summoned by Eggman. Fang has his own solid identity as a Sonic villain, and as we've seen, Sega just cannot make new villains.
While Fang was created in the days when Sonic ran over checkered squares of grass, his character would be rather simple to adapt to the recent settings of the franchise, particular the areas present in the Adventures titles. Unlike the Chaotix, who had to become a trio of bumbling morons to fit the bill, casting Fang as an outlaw criminal who picks off his prey from the rooftops of Station Square would make him, and the franchise, a whole lot cooler.
"C'mon, guys... Eggman Nega instead of me? Really?"
5. Wart
Topping our list of the five villains who need to get their asses back to kidnapping princesses is... WART! Mario fans will know who I'm talking about, and the occasional friend-of-a-gamer will also recognize the name. Wart is the boss of the amazingly different Doki Doki Panic, known here in the states as Super Mario Bros. 2. This was the only main console Super Mario game where Bowser wasn't waiting for the plumber at the end of the final castle. Instead you found this guy perched high atop his throne.
This guy, and he was totally nude.
What sets Wart apart from Mario's other scaly nemesis is that while Bowser has tried to capture the Mushroom Kingdom at least ten times and failed at each one, Wart had already imprisoned the royal family, enslaved the inhabitants, and established a new government order before Mario even arrived on the scene. Also unlike Bowser, Mario and Luigi weren't enough to stop Wart. It took the additional help of Peach and Toad, and even then they had to rely on forcing the amphibian to choke down something he was allergic to before he would cough up the key and make his exit.
Wart and his soldiers are solely responsible for building more than half of what the common person can identify as the Marioverse, and that's why he earns his spot at the top of the list of unjustly forgotten villains.
