Monday, September 12, 2011

Oh, What the Hell? Rufus in Street Fighter x Tekken

Friends and followers should know that I'm a pretty avid gamer, and regularly shirk any and all of my responsibilities to sneak off and push some buttons. Actually, if you remember at the beginning of last month (about) I admitted to having been rather inactive due to a recent and debilitating need to play the Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask (which I still haven't beaten due to that nasty lock-up glitch that plagues the Collector's Edition disc.)

Capcom has been showing of videos that, until today, have accomplished their goal as being the sexiest strip tease in video game history, although they were walking on thin ice with that farting Kuma bit. But that was excusable, since he could already do that. Unfortunately, Capcom decided to show off the one thing that can ruin an awesome strip tease, the only real boner killer when there's talk of a lap dance: they've admitted that their limelight guzzling super model has herpes.

And the herpes look like this.
If you owned a copy of Street Fighter IV in any of its incarnations, you've probably had the misfortune of either playing as or coming up against this rumbly, tumbly mass of bad idea. This guy's name is Rufus, and he was the worst thing to take up memory on Street Fighter IV, and he continues to ruin perfectly nice, healthy, beautiful, young games in what can only be a pitiful attempt at either redemption or justification. Or, maybe he just wants to share his nightmare, who really knows?

Happy trail and all, Rufus is intent on ruining this game before it's even gone out of the gate. All I can do is hope the amount of awesome to follow this poor decision is enough to wash Rufus out of mind, and with a little luck, out of sight. If you don't care two ways about who gets in and who doesn't, check out the reveal trailer (a waste of animation.) If you want to bitch, like I just did, check out the reveal trailer (still a waste of animation.) If you want to see the only thing that makes Rufus look good, check out the reveal trailer (If only it were Xiaoyu...)