Fantasy Smash Bros.: Virus

It might surprise you to know that Mario's second most recurring adversary isn't actually Wario, Donkey Kong, or even Tatanga! No, it's the Virus trio of Dr. Mario! They've been major villains in every Dr. Mario title to date (including Dr. Luigi and the little-known Dr. Wario) and minor opponents in two Mario & Luigi series games--making them the only traditional villains other than Bowser and the Koopa Pack to oppose the plumbers in an RPG. While Wario, Waluigi, and Donkey Kong have all appeared in many more games than these ne'er-feel-wells (and sometimes even as antagonists, as in the introduction to Mario Power Tennis), they haven't taken their vendetta quite as seriously as these vile virii.

With the other villains already scumming up the scene, it's only fitting that the scummiest of scumbags should make their Smash debut--especially with their arch-rival Dr. Mario marking his return!

THE ATTACKS

Up Special: Colonize - What is a virus' most principal power? Proliferation, of course! This ability works fairly similarly to Pac-Man's Power Pellet special, albeit in a terrifying way. The Virus will shake, giving birth to a swarm of smaller viruses which continue to reproduce along whatever path the player commans them to. When at last this colony runs out of reproductive steam, they'll deposit a large Virus at the end of the trail. Better hope you reach a ledge before then, however, or the large virus will simply plummet once more, with no energy left to resist. Enemies caught in the swarm won't necessarily be knocked away (unless the large virus spawns ontop of them, which acts as a launcher) but will succumb to the elemental effects of the swarm's color (more on that in a bit).

Neutral Special: Sneeze - Sneezing has got to be one of the worst parts about catching a cold. Sneeze here, sneeze there, leave your boogers everywhere. Since the viruses are essentially living sneezes it seemed only fitting to give them the one aspect not represented by a specific color. In this limited projectile attack (it has about the same range as the Ice Climbers' down special) the virus simply sneezes at his foe. Gross! The effect is different depending on which color you are: blue sneezes a frosty air, red sneezes a bust of flame, and the yellow's sneeze can cause a random status effect (either flower, sleep, or electrocution).

Side Special: Driver Virus - Mario Kart's little-known arcade equivalent, Mario Kart Arcade GP, introduced a very specific type of virus to the Mario universe: the Driver Virus. This little guy resembles Chill, although he wears a pair of swirling spectacles. In that game he would infect other racers' machines and slow them down. He acts much them same here, being thrown by the primary Virus. If it lands on an opponent, it'll circle around them and bog down their movements. Don't worry, it's not too difficult to eradicate the little pest--any attack will do, and it is possible to simply dodge-roll away. Bumping into another player will also pass the virus along, and it is possible to give it right back to the Virus. I guess it's true what they say: "What goes around comes around".

Down Special: Shake Off - The Virus is known for its trademark dance, and it has no problem with getting down right there on the field of battle! As it dances, small viruses of all colors launch from its body in a slew of different directions. They can protect the larger virus from attacks, or they can make other fighters ill if they come into contact with them. These viruses are a little like Pikmin, able to inflict a small amount of damage as long as they're attached. Fortunately they don't inflict any status ailments (aside from the red virus' burning sting).

Final Smash: Plague - All three viruses appear, performing their trademark dance while a storm of smaller ones rain down upon the stage. Players are given control of the falling swarm in much the same way that Mario manipulates his megavitamins in Dr. Mario. Unlike the little viruses in the down special, these ones will definitely inflict elemental damage when they hit opponents... so it's a good idea to watch your step!

THE STATS

Height: 3/10
Defense: 3/10
Jump: 8/10
Attack: 4/10
Speed: 5/10

Size - Viruses are usually tiny, but these ones come to about Mario's stomach. They're your typical ball-type character.

Defense - These little dudes aren't used to direct confrontation. They're pretty easy to knock away.

Jump - All viruses are great jumpers (how do you think they spread? Poor hygiene?) but these guys hail from the Mushroom Kingdom, where pretty much anybody can jump a mile high from a standstill.

Attack - They don't hit very hard, but don't let that fool you...

Speed - They're of average speed... They can get away from situations if they need to, but they won't be winning any footraces, that's for sure!

A Closer Look - It can be difficult to define the Virus stats because of they're gimmick. What? I haven't told you about their gimmick? Well let me fix that!

I know, I know, "Transforming Characters aren't in Smash anymore". While these guys technically are transformation characters, their method of transformation and the result of that transformation are pretty different from what we've seen in the past. Nothing as drastic as Zelda to Sheik or swapping between Pokemon, that's for sure. Also, this is Fantasy Smash Bros. I can do whatever I want. Originally the plan was to have them rotate in an out of battle like the Pokemon, but I thought: "No, they can be more unique than that!" For a while I went back and forth about making them a trio of clone characters or even alts. in the vein of Bowser Jr. and the Koopalings. Eventually I settled on a gimmick they exhibit in the Mario & Luigi franchise: damage-induced transformation. Because of this they are simply referred to as "Virus" on the select screens and victory menus (although they do actually have names--Fever, Chill, and Weird).

Whenever Virus takes a hit, even one as meager as 1% damage, it's forced to transform into another virus. The order is always Chill to Weird to Fever. Each virus has its own animations demonstrating their personality: Chill is cool, confident, and collected, Fever is jittery and craving to cause chaos, and Weird is timid. These personalities also give them slightly different stats, with Chill being the basic set posted above. Fever has a higher attack stat and can launch the farthest (the other two actually aren't very good for killing) while Weird is slower and has a bit of lag in its movements. The colors also feature different elemental attributes to some of their attacks. Chill can encase enemies in ice, Fever can engulf them in flames, and Weird... well, he's a little weird. Weird can induce flowering, sleep, paralysis, or electrocution entirely at random. This makes him the best at building up damage, even though he has the weakest launching potential.

Remember, the transformation is triggered by taking damage--it's impossible for the player to force a transformation. This can make it more challenging to find a winning strategy, but it also creates a conundrum for the opponent: they can attack the Virus, but this risks making it more powerful. The attack could also make it generally weaker, but also able to inflict more damage. Decisions, decisions.

Like any cold, it's best to take Virus out as quickly as possible!

THE COLORS

Things got a little hairy when choosing the colors for this terrible trio. Since there's three of them, they used up the primary colors pretty quickly... but I had to fill out at least eight (as per the new rules of Super Smash Bros. 4. I guess I have to revise some of the older Fantasy Smash characters...). There also isn't a whole lot of material to draw from--the Viruses have been largely unchanged throughout their history. As such, this is going to be a lot less broken down than other palette entries have been...

Basic Colors - These are the primary colors for the trio, as of Dr. Mario 64.

Second Color - Yellow, cyan, and magenta are the colors of the new viruses (Drowsy, magenta, and Dizzy) in Dr. Luigi. I tried to match the colors with personalities. Drowsy is relaxed, basically, so yellow went to Chill. The magenta virus looks afraid, so I gave it to the timid Weird. Dizzy looked to embrace the chaotic nature Fever has, so obviously cyan went to her (oh yeah, Fever's a girl if you didn't know).

Third and Fourth Palette - Green, Orange, Purple and Black, Gray, and White palettes are just fillers. I finished the rainbow colors, and added the extreme ends of the light spectrum.

Fifth Palette - The fifth palette (first on the left, second row) is the basic NES colors. There's only a slight variation in tone and the colors for gloves and boots are different enough to the standard colors that I figure it should be okay.

Last Three Palettes - I really had to reach for inspiration with these last few. Eventually I decided to pull some influence from the other monster-driven Mario puzzler: Wario's Woods. These colors are all based on these weird little dudes that I thought looked suspiciously similar to the Viruses...

THE VICTORY

THE EMBLEM

Fantasy Smash Bros.: Scyther

Scyther appears ready to rumble! Not as a playable character, though. This bug burst from a Pokéball to serve as a spiritual successor to Hitmonlee and Scizor's roles from Super Smash Bros. and Super Smash Bros. Melee respectively. However, their code of conduct has been outmoded. Leaping twice around the stage just doesn't cut it these days.

Get it?

To compete with the fancy shmancy and new-fangled Assist Trophies, Scyther has decided to take the Knuckle Joe approach to things: by serving as an impromptu combatant on the arena! This bug's got one bad 'tude, and he'll hunt down your enemies without mercy. They shouldn't worry too much though, because while his blades will hurt, Scyther doesn't have any kill moves. Instead he slashes up the competition, bringing their damage on high and letting somebody else make the finishing blow.

Additional Note: As of this point, all combat-type assists can be damaged, battled, and KOed.

Fantasy Smash Bros.: Marill

Marill, sometimes incorrectly (but lovingly) referred to as Pikablu, was one of the first Generation II Pokémon to be shown prior to the games' release in 1999. He was also one of the Pokémon to appear in Melee out of a Pokéball, where he would perform the attack Tackle on opponents. I have redesignated this role to Poliwag, whose body type is very similar to Marill's. Marill also has the distinction of being the middle member of the most boringly named evolutionary lineage in the franchise, growing out of an Azurill and evolving into an Azumarill.

Not only was Marill one of the original posterboys for the Generation II games, but it showed up during the Orange Islands arc of the anime as the mascot Pokémon of Ash's new companion, Tracey Sketchit. While neither Marill nor Tracey were members of the primary cast for very long, Tracey's Marill does have the title of the only primary trainer Pokémon to lay an egg.

In addition to all this, I always had a special fondness for Pikablu and have wanted him to join the ranks of the Smash stars since before Melee was released, and I can even remember the feeling of disappointment as I flipped through the pages of my official strategy guide and found that Marill had been relegated to the overlooked slot of weak and pathetic Pokéball summon.

The Attacks

B + Up: Aqua Jet - Encasing himself like a liquid torpedo, Marill propels himself in pretty much any direction and pushes away all enemies in his path.

B Neutral: Bubble - Marill takes a deep breath then lets it all out with a barrage of beautiful, boucing bubbles. The bubbles will pop once they travel too far from Marill, and they don't deal much damage or knock-back. However, they can be aimed much like the fire blasts of Bowser and Charizard. Additionally, the bubbles are good defensively, as they can halt items and most projectiles. Unfortunately Marill can only blow bubbles for so long before he tires out.

B + Side: Covet - Somewhat uncharacteristic of the shy water-mouse, Marill hops up and slams into enemies. Though the attack is light and causes flinching as opposed to knock-back, it has a second function which opponents might find more annoying: it steals their items. The only exceptions to this rule are items which are no longer physically held by the player, such as Starmen.

B + Down: Defense Curl - When the going gets rough, the meek get curling. Marill rolls in the air and spins into a blur of solid blue, which can easily deflect any and all projectile attacks. Only the strongest of physical moves can damage the pipsquirt in this state.

Final Smash: Rain Dance - When Marill grabs the Smash Ball, the kiddy gloves are off! Normally Marill is a weaker player, but after performing the Rain Dance it starts to pour, and Marill loves his showers. Not only does the monsoon flood the stage and make it slippery for all other characters, but it invigorates Marill, doubling his attack strength and nearly tripling the amount of knock-back his attacks do. Combine this with the lowered traction and the inability to grab ledges (as they become rushing waterfalls) and you've got a dangerous situation for the few seconds before the storm clears.

The Stats

Size - 3/10

Weight - 2/10

Strength - 2/10

Speed - 8/10

Jump - 3/10

Size - Marill is recorded in the Pokédex as being one-foot four-inches, the exact same height as Pikachu. Super Smash Bros. uses a less distinct system of height, however, and in Melee Marill was absolutely tiny. He's been scaled up a bit, to about the height of Kirby and Jigglypuff, to play a more competitive game with the veterans.

Weight - According to the Pokédex, Marill ways a whopping eighteen pounds! Unfortunately that doesn't translate very well when your opponents are half-ton turtles and gorillas.

Strength - Marill's small size and lightweight contribute to it fitting quite comfortably in the "Powderpuff" class of fighters. Its attacks are typically light and do more in the way of causing enemies to flinch than to be knocked back.

Speed - Making up for its *ahem* shortcomings, Marill is a speedy little guy. This makes it a good idea to Covet items away from enemies and head for the hills, where you can take them out from afar.

Jump - Marill isn't exactly built for maneuvering on the land. While it might make up for this by being fast, it can't jump very high at all. Reaching higher platforms might prove to be a challenge for the little guy.

A Closer Look - While on the outset it would seem that Marill is almost certainly doomed in any competition without items, there are a few other things which need to be considered. Most importantly is the fact that while Marill's stats might be somewhat lacking he makes up for it in two ways. First and most notably, Marill's best stat in the Pokémon games is its Defense stat. This translates into Smash to make the game a little more balanced in Marill's favor by automatically cushioning the attacks against him: by a full 50%! Every attack done to Marill does half as much damage as it would against any other player. That ought to even things out a little bit!

Additionally, while Marill's attacks are typically light and fluffy, the Pokémon has brought out the big guns with its signature ability, Huge Power. This ability will sometimes activate when Marill is attacking, and will make his attacks deal twice as much damage and twice as much knock-back. A pretty sweet situation, all things considered.

The Color Palettes

Basic Palette - The primary palette is blue with a white belly. This color scheme is also used for when Marill is used on the Blue Team.

Pink Palette - This palette is inspired by an early concept artwork for Marill. This is also used when Marill is on the Red Team.

Green Palette - This palette is actually Shiny Marill. This is used when Marill is also on the Green Team.

Yellow Palette - This palette is inspired by Azumarill's shiny colors. It is also inspired by the nickname "Pikablu."

White Palette - This palette is a reversal of the basic color scheme, because it looks cool. It also has a more icy tone, which is appropriate since Marill can learn some ice attacks.

Multi-Color Palette - Inspired by a beach ball, which could have been one of Marill's inspirations.

The Victory Theme

Marill shares his victory theme with every other Pokémon character.

Fantasy Smash Bros.: Poliwag

For the first time in Smash history, Poliwag joins the fray! Not as a playable superstar, however. Instead Poliwag has the honor of being Fantasy Smash Bros.' first Pokéball Pokémon. Unfortunately poor Polly-Wolly isn't too astounding in any other way, because he's just here to fill in the spot of another Poképal. After being summoned, Poliwag dashes across the stage tapping enemies with whom he makes contact. Though he doesn't deal a terrible lot of damage, Poliwag's attacks can be annoying and foes who are caught at the wrong angles can be dragged right off the edge.

To put it simply for you Smashsperts out there, Poliwag is performing the same role that Marill did in Melee.

Fantasy Smash Bros.: Zapper

Super Smash Bros. Melee reintroduced the Super Scope as a rapid-fire weapon in the Nintendo Universe, but the original light gun hasn't been seen since the days of old. While the Ray Gun's mechanics are perfectly suited for the Zapper, it has been instead decided to leave the generic ray pistol in place of a more historic video game artifact. Righting this wrong, it's Nathan DiYorio to the rescue!

The Zapper does function similarly to the Ray Gun, firing with the same frequency energy blasts which look similar to and travel at the same speeds as the rays. However, there are several primary differences to the use and function of the Zapper. For starts, the Zapper's zaps are more limited in number, with each gun only able to fire five shots before it's all used up. But second, and most notably, zaps do not damage enemies. Absolutely zero percent damage will be done to them.

Instead the gun's usefulness lies elsewhere. While the Ray Gun and Super Scope are both excellent weapons for sniping enemies from across the screen, the Zapper is more suitable up close or when in teams. When struck by a zap, an enemy is frozen. Not frozen by ice, but, well, zapped. Strangled in a surge of energy, completely immobile for a good long bit. Two or three seconds, about. This leaves ample opportunity for a player or their allies to deliver a mighty Smash Attack and send the point home.

Fantasy Smash Bros.: Super Leaf (Item)

The Super Leaf was the second primary power-up introduced in the Super Mario Bros. franchise, and the selling point of the famous Super Mario Bros. 3. Grabbing this leaf allowed the Marios to gain raccoon tails, which allowed them to fly for reasons never explained! The Super Leaf has recently returned to prominance as an item which transforms Mario or Luigi into either their raccoon suits or the more powerful tanooki suits, depending on the game.

In the original title the Super Leaf gave players the ability to fly and an additional offensive ability in the form of a mean tail swipe which could quickly down enemies without the need to hop on them. In Fantasy Smash Bros. the Super Leaf would perform only one of the raccoon suit's many functions: a slow and controlled descent. Grabbing the Super Leaf (by tapping A infront of it, as the leaf will not be activated upon contact) will cause the player to sprout a pair of raccoon ears and a raccoon tail. While in this form players can tap the jump button repeatedly to perform a more controlled descent than that allowed by the parasol. Also unlike the parasol, the raccoon tail will damage enemies who happen to get too close, and can even spike foes who are hit in just the right spot.

Unlike many other items, the Super Leaf does not restrict the player's moveset in any way. It actually behaves much like the Bunny Hood, simply enhancing the combatant's abilities for a short time or until it is knocked off.

For characters with multiple jumps, the raccoon powers will only take effect after their other jumps have been utilized. The same is true of most character, only being useable after their secondary jumps have been utilized. In the case of Peach the descent may be utilized only after leaving her hover mode.

Fantasy Smash Bros.: Kuribo's Shoe

Following hotly on the heels of my Ice Flower post is another Fantasy Smash Bros. item, this time the ill-fated Kuribo's Shoe from Super Mario Bros. 3. The item appears only in one level, but it makes that level all the more memorable. While it has largely been relegated to the third act of the Super Mario Bros. franchise and its remakes, the Kuribo's Shoe was actually recently revisited, and this time properly translated as the Goomba's Shoe, in Paper Mario: Sticker Star, bringing some relevance to the item.

For those who aren't familiar with the Kuribo's Shoe (as an aside: "Kuribo" sounds way cooler than "Goomba" and adds a bit of mystique to the shoe. I grew up wondering who on Earth Kuribo was and if he'd ever show up in a future game. My inner child won't let that die.), it's an enormous green boot Mario can steal from Goombas which will protect him from spikes and other hazards which would otherwise cause him great harm. It was also shown to be quite powerful in its only appearance in The Adventures of Super Mario Bros. 3 animated series, easily able to stomp enemies flat.

Although with Super Koopa wearing the boot,
I imagine its stink is worse than its stomp.

In Super Smash Bros. the boot would be a bit of an oddity. Whilst wearing the shoe, players are unable to perform any regular or special attacks, taunts, grapples, or ground dodges. Nor are they capable of ledge grabbing (with a few exceptions, which will be noted below.) The only usual action which players can perform whilst wearing Kuribo's Shoe would be shielding, although aerial dodges will also work. The shoe makes up for this with its deadly stomp, which transforms the players jumps into gravitational battering rams. Enemies who happen to be in the air when stomped by the boot will find themselves immediately and mercilessly spiked, while enemies who are already on the ground will be buried or launched depending on their damage percent.

Characters which utilize wings to perform multiple jumps will find that they are now restricted merely to two jumps, but that their second jump is much higher than average. Additionally, Yoshi's fluttering ability and Peach's gliding ability will not work while wearing the shoe. Kirby, King Dedede, and Jigglypuff can all make full advantage of their puff jumps while wearing the boot.

Walking without jumping will cause the player to hop forward with a bit of a kicking motion. Enemies who are unfortunate enough to be caught in this kick will be knocked back a bit and given some damage. This makes approaching the Kurbio's Shoe without an attack strategy a dangerous proposition.

In most instances, utilizing a character's recovery move will release them from the boot, which will either fall off the screen or land for another player to use--unless it has been worn for a long period, in which case it will simply disappear. Exceptions to this rule are characters with tether recoveries, who will still dangle while wearing the boot. They cannot, however, properly edge-grab and will perform a small hop after yanking themselves upward with their tether. In the case of Zero Suit Samus, her down B move will flip her out of the boot. Olimar's standard special will pluck him from the stinky depths, and Ivysaur must be swapped out to escape the shoe.

While it might seem that the boot, at the cost of restriction, transforms players into impenetrable tanks, this is far from the truth. Players can be launched out of the boot just as they can drop any item when beaten severely, and players are also otherwise not invulnerable to attack. A player brandishing Kuribo's Shoe can be knocked about just as easily as before, and the shoe will not protect them from an edge-screen death, or any other unfortunate end. While the item is incredibly powerful and can turn the tides of battle, using it might not be the best choice for some players.

*There is, however, a couple of circumstances where a player would normally take damage that the boot shall protect them from. For starters, the bottom of the shoe is completely impenetrable. This does not necessarily mean that wearers cannot be attacked from below, as they can always be spun by another attack. It does, however, mean that they are capable of blocking all attacks on the bottom of their shoe, including Bob-ombs. They are also able to stand on spike hazards without taking damage. Additionally, a character who has been launched can become a human cannonball if the sole of their shoe happens to contact an enemy Smasher.

Fantasy Smash Bros.: Ice Flower

That's right! Fantasy Smash Bros. is back! I just can't help myself. It's like I live, breathe, and eat Super Smash Bros. Maybe that's why I suffer from some ghastly malnutrition. I'm not sure how many of these posts I'll be making. In the past they got very long and tiring, which is why I made so few of them. I do know that pretty much every second of every day gives me a brand new idea which could be added to the series, and I don't have the know-how to make a fan game! How better to exercise these ideas than to post them on the internet and allow myself the deluded fantasy of Sakurai knocking on my door and begging for my assistance?

Actually, there's probably a lot of healthier methods... Oh well. Grandeur away!

Today instead of a character or stage, which I think were the only things I had done in the past, I've got an item. Short and sweet descriptions on this one, which is just what I need to drag me out of the gloom for a bit without wearing myself down. (I don't know if I'll get to explaining this, but today has been a real downer for me without any particular reasons. Just one of those days where you wake up and the day already sucks and you're just in a crap mood.)

The Ice Flower first showed up in Super Mario Galaxy, and was probably one of the selling points of the game. Being a sort of Bizarro Fire Flower, the item instantly got fans riled up. Not to mention that it had been a staple of Super Mario fan games for years before its official debut. The Ice Flower truly is an antithesis to the Fire Flower, allowing Mario to freeze enemies in their tracks as opposed to frying them. Ever since its arrival on the scene, the Ice Flower has become a mainstay of the franchise. It returned in New! Super Mario Bros. Wii with the useful ability of freezing enemies into solid blocks which could be used as both platforms and weapons. While it doesn't quite have the range of the Fire Flower, the Ice Flower has proven itself as a unique and useful addition to the Marios' arsenal.

Like its firey cousin, the Ice Flower wouldn't perform exactly as it should in the Super Smash Bros. universe. Instead of transforming its user into an iceball pitching machine the Ice Flower, continuing to prove itself an opposing force to the Fire Flower, emits a powerful myst which freezes enemies on contact. The best way to go about describing would be to say that while the Fire Flower is comparable to Bowser and Charizard's fire breathing attacks, the Ice Flower would be comparable to the Ice Climbers' "Blizzard" attack. Although the Ice Climbers' attack is similar, the Ice Flower has a greater chance of leaving its target encased in ice.

That's it for the Ice Flower. To be honest, I think this item actually has a legitimate chance of showing up for the next Super Smash Bros. title. Since it's been a long time since my previous Fantasy Smash Bros. entry, you can follow the link here to get to the old hub page I used to use for the project. I don't think I'll be using it anymore, but it should be up to date as far as my previous post of this nature.

If there's one thing I love as much as playing Super Smash Bros. and talking about my own ideas, it's reading your ideas. What do you think of the Ice Flower concept? Do you have any item ideas of your own? If you do, post in the comments below. And if anyone out there has figured out a way to utilize the Super Flower from Super Mario Land as an item in any relevant capacity, I'd love to read about it.

My Biggest Wish for the Next Super Smash Bros.?

I've talked a lot about Super Smash Bros. in the past, even working on my own Fantasy Smash Project from time to time. In the good old days before every single forum on the internet was a breeding ground for Angry-Asshole Disorder, I used to join in on the Smash fandom by registering and participating in basically every Smash themed forum I could find. Those were good old days. A bunch of twelve-year-olds sitting around fantasizing about the most insane rosters they could imagine, debating whether or not a Paper Mario character would be insulting to the Revolution's graphics, drawing crappy little sprite edit stages and slapping a name over them. Oh, those days.

But here I am years later, still thinking about what would give me the greatest nerdgasm from a future Smash title, and I realize something: I don't need new characters, stages, or items. I don't need a lengthy adventure mode, beautifully reorchestrated music, or added multiplayer modes. These are all great things, and if they get skimpy with them I'll be quite sore, but there is one thing that I feel could advance the Smash franchise, or at least the experience, in so many ways. And with Namco working on the next release(s?) there's actually a decent chance of this showing up.

I want a color editor. I don't even want a full costume creator. All I want is a deep and well-thought-out color editor for the roster. The key factor would be to not have the editor remove the existing alternate color schemes, but to simply add a new one. Maybe you could use the shoulder buttons to scroll through the colors, R being for pre-set "official" colors, and L being for custom colors.

This is all I want to enhance my Smash experience. All I want is to change Mario from red to blue or brown or whatever possible color I want. Grab Soul Calibur's immense color array and shove it next to a Nintendo character. Give me free draw and paint bucket tools, and a "barrier" tool to determine where I want the color fill to stop, and I will be the happiest camper on the planet.

This would create the "deep, new experience" a lot of Smashers are craving, and that Nintendo seems to be clawing for. So I say let's do it. Give us the paint tool, Nintendo. It'll make us happy.

Fantasy Smash Bros.: Fighting Polygon

It's been a surprising while since I've done a Fantasy Smash post, especially considering how ridiculously obsessive I am about this franchise. And unfortunately, this post will be a short one as there isn't a whole lot to say about this particular character. (Species, maybe?)

The Fighting Polygon Team were introduced in the original in the original Super Smash Bros. for the Nintendo 64, and were promptly never heard from again. However, their legacy has lived on. In Super Smash Bros.: Melee for the GCN, the Polygons were replaced with an updated form known as the Fighting Wire Frames, though these only had two forms: a male and a female. They were followed by a third successor in Super Smash Bros.: Brawl: the Fighting Alloys, which were more powerful and adept fighters than the Wire Frames, having more forms, but unlike either of their predecessors, the Alloys were unable to utilize weapons in combat.

For the first time in over ten years, the Fighting Polygons return, this time as a playable character. The only character to represent the Super Smash Bros. franchise that can be used by players without hacking, the Fighting Polygon begins each battle as a randomly generated Polygon which mimics any of the currently unlocked playable characters. When a Polygon is defeated, a separate Polygon will respawn, taking the form and moves of a different character.

That's the gimmick, you see.

This makes the Fighting Polygon kind of like Smash Bros.' answer to Mokujin. The Polygon's take not only the shape of the other fighters, but also their stats, taunts, attacks, victory and loss animations. And this time around, unlike the last, the Polygons are capable of using the special attacks and Final Smashes of the individuals they're modeled after. However, the Polygons do not copy the sounds (actually, Polygons lack voices. The only sounds they make are the sounds of movement and impact.) or entrances of the fighters they mimic.

The entrance would be the same for all Fighting Polygons: a platform appears above the stage, upon which the Polygon materializes. Just like the entrance used for all characters in Melee, and the respawn used in all games. This is in honor of the Polygon being the only playable Smash Bros. native. Here's a video from Melee to show you what I mean:

Additionally, while the Polygons mimic the victory animations of the original character, they do not use that character's victory theme. Instead, the victory theme for the Polygons is the first ten or so seconds of the intro theme from Melee. Right up until the big "baaaaaaahhhhh" which would be cut short but spiced up to fit with the snazzy "YOU WIN" feel of the victory tunes.

I guess that's about all I can say on the Polygons. Here's their alternate palettes. The first four are based not only on the multiplayer colors, but also the Alloy colors. The last costume is based on the Primids from the Subspace Emissary.

Fantasy Smash Bros.: Veteran - Princess Peach

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It seems like all I've been posting lately is something that has to do with Fantasy Smash Bros., but that's perfectly fine with me. Today we're taking a look at the first veteran to land on my Fantasy Smash roster: Princess Peach. Originally the plan was to just keep putting out moveset ideas, but I can't help myself. I just had to go and mess with the characters that were already there. It couldn't be helped!

Although to be fair, Princess Toadstool had little that needed to be changed. The biggest alteration here is to her costume set, which I felt was a little lacking in anything that was actually relevant to the character or Nintendo. Her movelist remains the same, but I'll go over that for people who might not be familiar with her, and I'll do my best to put her stats to my scale.

If.. If I'm not too.. dis..stracted...

THE ATTACKS

Princess Peach, having already starred in a pair of Smash Bros. games, has an established and well-rounded moveset that does good justice to the history of the character. For the most part, anyways. I don't know where exactly Peach Bomber is from, but it makes the dear Princess just a bit more usable, so it's all good. There were a few largely aesthetic components that were bugging me, so I've changed them to something a little more suitable. However, despite looking a little different, Peach plays exactly as she has previously.

Up + B: Perry - Princess Peach has two representative icons: hearts, and parasols. In the past two Smash Bros. games Peach was armed with a flowery and elegant parasol which she used to drift peacefully back to Earth (or jab her enemies in the ass).

I see London, I see France.

And while that pink floaty umbrella is all fine and dandy, she was given something with a little more character when she embarked on her treacherous journey to rescue the Mario Bros. in Super Princess Peach. I welcome you to Perry, the magical talking umbrella, and faithful companion to Princess of the Mushroom Land.

Aw, how cute. STAB GOOMBAS WITH IT!

Now, Perry doesn't just talk. He's magical. And kind of terrifying. In Super Princess Peach, the Princess could scoop enemies into Perry's underbelly, where he devours them whole. Luckily, Kirby and Pikachu have nothing to worry about, because Perry came to the Fantasy Smash on a full stomach. He behaves exactly as the previous Peach Parasol move did: Peach can leap into the air with Perry stabbing upward pretending they're the Penguin. She can then open him up and catch some air, floating harmlessly back to the platforms below.

Standard B: Heart - Whoa Nate, whoa. What the hell do you think you're doing here? Everyone and their mom knows that Peach's standard B attack is Toad. What are you smoking that made you forget that? You need to fix that right now, because this isn't funny.

Toad getting shot in the face is funny!

Except it's annoyingly out of character Peach to shove anyone in front of her like that. Peach hates having a secret service everywhere she goes. Peach hates seeing people hurt. Originally Toad was going to be replaced by Toadsworth, but no, because Peach wouldn't want to stick him out in front of missiles either. Peach does not put others before herself.

Not only is sacrificing one of her own servants completely out of character, but Peach has access to a host of her own defensive magical abilities. Like, y'know, the Hearts from Mario Kart: Double Dash!!

Oh yeah. Those are a thing, aren't they?

Indeed, a thing they are! Two things in fact! But for our purpose, they're multiple little things. Like the altered Perry attack, the new Heart move behaves exactly like Toad used to. Peach can use the defensive power of the Heart to deflect projectiles, or, under the right conditions, reverse attacks with greatly multiplied force, sending her unfortunate adversaries blasting off again.

The only change made between Heart and Toad is one of aesthetics: instead of thrusting a hapless mushroom retainer to take he bullet for her, Toad waves her hands around in the air in front of herself, generating a stream of sparkling, magic shield hearts. And the best part?

They have little, smiling faces! :3

Side + B: Peach Bomber - The Peach Bomber is one of Toadstool's most effective maneuvers. This enthusiastic hip thrust is pretty good at clearing away enemies, and making sure everybody gets the hell away from you. It's the same technique one uses to clear out Mushroom Land paparazzi.

Defying gravity, physics, and bone structure, Peach glides over the air and smashes enemies with her brawny buttocks, propelling them away with great force.

Down + B: Vegetable - In Super Mario Bros. 2, also known as Super Mario Bros. USA, the main weapon Peach and her lowly servants utilized against the Shy Guy club and their bizarre overlords were an assortment of turnips, radishes, and other vegetables, which are apparently heavy as bricks in Mario land.

While these items had to be plucked from tall, dancing blades of grass in their game of origin, Peach has come into Smash with an arsenal stashed somewhere deep within the ruffles of her dress. She can pluck one of these out of the ground in a second, and heaven help the Koopa who it gets hurled at.

The vegetables, exclusively turnips for the Princess' use, have a variety of expressions which determine how much damage they'll do. The only one to really look out for, however, is the one that looks like it just saw Mama Koopa giving birth, because that one delivers an almost instant kill.

Because it's either: kill someone else, or suicide.

Final Smash: Peach Blossom - Peach loves to spread joy and cheer, and what could make anybody more happy than a delightful catnap? The Princess grants this wish to all players on the ground, rendering them all unconscious for a long number of seconds. The closer the players are to Toadstool, the longer they sleep for. To make matters worse, the magic used to put her foes to sleep also does a large amount of damage to them, depending again on their proximity to the Princess.

All of this occurs while Peach dances and sings joyfully, framed on either side by delightful images of her delicate figure and of course some happily drawn hearts.

She's about as innocent as Madonna.

Because there wasn't enough explosions to make the attack seem a little heavier to those thrill-seeking types, peach trees sprout from the sides of the screen and blossom, dropping a large number of the delicious fruit onto the stage. Peach can have a short snack while her enemies nap, healing herself before she smacks them over the head with a frying pan.

THE STATS

Size - 6/10

Weight - 4/10

Strength - 4/10

Speed - 3/10

Jump - 6/10

The Breakdown:

Size - Peach is taller than Mario and Luigi, but that really isn't saying much when you're standing next to a gorilla and a two-ton dragonturtle. But as far as humans go, Peach is pretty darn tall. It's almost a miracle she doesn't break her back bending over to kiss Mario on his volleyball of a nose. Then again, she's probably used to it.

Weight - Of course a Princess must watch her diet. Tall and skanky - er - lithe, Peach doesn't way very much at all. Actually, most of her weight probably comes from her high heels, which she insists on wearing absolutely everywhere. Even though she's lighter than most average folks, Peach isn't always competing with average folks, and she's still a bit heavier than some of the weird creatures her royal blondness is competing with.

Strength - While Peach has a few deadly attacks at her disposable, the overall effectiveness of slaps and backhands aren't much when compared to being punched in the face by a dinosaur. Regardless, she has enough power to hold her own if she has to.

Speed - The Princess might be zipping around tennis courts without a hitch, but wearing a pink ballgown to the Smash wasn't the brightest idea. Neither were those heels I mentioned earlier. Peach's attire really slows her down, and she has a hard time getting around because of it.

Jump - The one thing Peach has always had going for her, that wasn't related to her legs, breasts, butt, undergarments, thighs, lips, soft palms, or sports thongs was her natural gift for jumping. In Super Mario Bros. 2, Peach could not only leap higher than both Mario and Toad, but she could also keep herself aloft by use of magic, an ability which has become one of her signature skills.

The Alternate Palettes

Ah, yes, now we come to the fun part. At least, it was for me. In both Brawl and Melee, Peach had a number of costumes that she could wear out onto the field. Unfortunately, only one of these was actually something she wore, and only one of them was a reference to somebody else. The other four costumes were all simple recolors with very little, if any, definition behind their existence. Here's what I would have done if I had to come up with some color schemes for the Princess.

Peach likes to play dress up.

Palette One: Peach's iconic look remains as her standard color of choice.

Palette Two: Peach's Red Team costume isn't perfect, but she decided to try her best and dress herself up as Mario's first honey: Pauline. Pauline hasn't been romantically involved with the plumber for a number of years, not since Donkey Kong kidnapped her well before Peach was even around. But when Princess Toadstool finally did come onto the scene, she was little more than a Pauline knock-off in the same way that Daisy was to her. Now they've gone their separate paths, but Peach still wants to prove that she can wear the better dress.

But to be fair, Pauline never seems to wear one for very long...

Palette Three: Super Mario Galaxy introduced gamers to a whole new side of the Mario universe, the prurient Princess Rosalina. Though she hasn't been around nearly as long as Daisy, Peach, or Pauline, Rosalina struck an immediate chord with fans, and she was quickly cast as the next femme fatale of the Mario universe, making her way into the Mario Kart franchise posthaste. This new princess bears great similarity to the Peach of past, so naturally there's no reason not to dress her up in a similar manner.

Something seems familiar about you...

Palette Four: I had to dig a little deeper into Mario lore to find a suitable green costume for Princess Peach. I almost chose Frog Suit colors based off of that one time she wore it in the Super Mario Bros. 3 cartoon. However, I soon discovered a lovely dead lady in a stunning green dress.

Did I mention she was dead?

The Floating Whirlindas are a pair of ghosts that haunt Mario's brother in one of the greatest series spin-offs to date: Luigi's Mansion. While the couple don't have names, the Lady Whirlinda seemed like a great fit for an interesting Peach costume.

Palette Five: Naturally, I couldn't forget about Peach's classic Daisy mimic. She's been wearing a Daisy costume since Melee, and she wouldn't miss any opportunity to show her bff some love.

Palette Six: This costume actually has two origins. It's a composite of Princess Toadstool as she appeared in The Super Mario Bros. Super Show, and the very first Princess Peach sprite featured in the original Super Mario Bros. on the NES. Peach's usual pink color scheme was a later invention. In her first video game appearance, the Princess wore a white and orange dress. In addition to this, Peach wasn't originally a blond. She used to be a redhead. Go figure.

Have a look for yourself!

THE VICTORY THEME

In closing: here's the celebratory theme shared by all who come from the land of mushroom.

Now I'm off to... play some... Melee...

Fantasy Smash Bros.: Game & Watch Land

It's not just characters who will be showing up in my Fantasy Smash Bros. events! Here's the first of hopefully many stages that I will/have craft/ed up in the coming months. 

This lovely little monster I like to call: Game & Watch Land. It's inspired by the Game & Watch Gallery series and its modern take on some of Nintendo's earliest titles. This stage was particularly crafted with Game & Watch Gallery 4 in mind. I wasn't able to fit in everything I wanted to, but I feel that the number of platforms and size of the stage itself make up for the lack of added gimmicks.

Originally I had intended to include animatronic Mario characters who would play out their role from the designated titles, but as I started to build the stage I realized that wasn't going to work. Which is unfortunate, because I really like the idea.

The primary influences are the Donkey Kong and Octopus minigames, but the stage also carries elements from Fire Attack, Donkey Kong 3, and Donkey Kong JR. These come together in the three separate "regions" displayed on the stage itself: jungle, sea, and construction. There's also a little bit of a sky region, but not a whole lot.

The vines and ladders can be climbed up by characters, although jumping is probably quicker. The pair of cloud platforms at the top of the stage act very similarly to the ones in the Yoshi Story stage, disappearing when used for too long. Both of the red pipes on the mechanical platform are operational, so players can use them for a quick escape should the need arise. The red tube in the jungle area isn't usable by players, but goombas will occasionally climb out of it and march along the platform, not posing much of a threat.

The main focus, and thing to avoid, here is the Octopus. That little tugboat on the surface of the water chugs along between the two land areas and acts as the only thing stopping players from taking a dip with doom. Once beneath the ocean waves, players move more slowly, but also jump higher. Unfortunately, they're at the mercy of the Octopus, who will reach out with his mighty tentacles to ensnare careless players. If they're even more unfortunate, he'll catapult them right off the reef and into the murky, blue abyss.

I just wanna play tea party!

Other than the Octopus, there isn't a whole lot here that can hurt players, and the level design has a lot to offer virtually all of the character types. There's a fair bit of straight space for larger characters like Bowser to play around in, and platforms the fight-and-flight types like Pit to escape to. There's also enough obstructions that lighter characters should bounce around a bit and last a little longer than on some of the more vacant stages. Like Smashville and Final Destination, most characters should feel right at home in Game & Watch Land!

THE MUSIC

Of course part of a stage's charm is the music! Here's five songs I think probably work best.

Game & Watch Gallery 4's Boxing is probably the closest we're going to get to an official Mario fighter. While the music doesn't exactly get the blood rushing, it's not a terrible song for the stage, and being a fighter of sorts, I thought it would be appropriate.

A short, crazy tune that borders on being a jingle, the second background to the Rain Shower game is fast paced and fitting for frantic battles. This is the kind of song you'd play with the items turned all the way up.

Of course the Octopus is the main focus of the stage, so it wouldn't do to leave out the big guy's anthem.

This is a cool remix of the background music from Fire, done by M3L33MAST3R. The original version of the song was featured in Brawl's Flat Zone 2 stage, but this remix is a lot more Smash friendly. It also helps that Fire is one of the most recognizable Game & Watch titles.

Wrapping things up is this remix from the Mario vs Donkey Kong series, which isn't all that indifferent from Game & Watch and other arcade styled Mario games. This remix is nice and chill, for those who just want to kick back with some friends for some calming knock-outs.

Fantasy Smash Bros.: Donkey Kong JR

Wow, I guess I took a vacation last month. Sorry about that. I'm thinking about doing some other things with the blog though, including reviews if I can ever get around to it (which I never seem to be able to do these days), but right now I'm coming back with the series I started before that I absolutely love, because it's something I can almost never think about. And this has become even more true since we were essentially promised a return to the Super Smash Bros. franchise in the coming future. I'm gonna keep this up until Nintendo actually tells us what's going on, and just because I'm fair, I'll probably keep playing at it after that.

Bringing us back to style, and not leaving his own behind, Donkey Kong JR is joining the Fantasy Smash extravaganza! This powerful primate isn't short in either stature or tricks, being taller than the famed plumber of lore at the young age of "child", and a master of sports, kart racing, and mathematics all while still presumably in diapers!

Look at that genius at work!
Or maybe it's just lice?

But before all the paparazzi and scholarships, JR was just a simple ape living the life of a backwater gorilla. Unfortunately, it wasn't all bananas and vines. JR was called into action early in his young life when the dubious Super Mario, then known by his superheroic alias, "Jumpman", defeated and imprisoned "Papa Donkey Kong."

Almost immediately JR set forth to free his father, and soon found himself going face to face with the plumber!.. Zoo keeper!.. Carpenter!.. Doctor!.. Construction worker!.. Mario! Despite Mario's seeming status as a "hero", he had a few baddies under his control who eerily resemble the Klaptraps, the most terrifying members of the Kremling Krew. These monsters, with their voracious appetites, saw to it that JR wasn't going to simply walk through the zoo. No, not at all.

Luckily, they were terrible at everything.

As testament to JR's genius and resourcefulness, he managed to dispatch any and all opposition with the deadly powers of fruit. In this primates hands, bananas and strawberries became projectile weapons the likes of which would make Bullseye duck for cover.

JR didn't vanish after his first anti-heroic escapades, however. He went on to get a math degree after some rigorous tutelage from his father, who didn't want the same dead end future he had (capturing damsels is a road to nowhere. Just ask King Koopa). He was also involved in his father's revenge scandal, where he worked hard to prevent Mario from yet again rescuing Pauline in Donkey Kong for the original Game Boy. Among his other numerous returns to the gaming realm, JR would show up most prominently after making the leap from Brooklyn to the Mushroom Kingdom, where he participated in a number of sports in karting events, most notably the first two Mushroom Kingdom Royal Tennis Championships, and the first Mushroom Kingdom Grand Prix.

Where he was as big as Bowser, because apparently apes are freakin' huge.

The next time JR showed up, he was supposedly an adult waging war with the terrifying Kaptain K. Rool. But since I don't believe any of that nonsense, we're just going to assume he still wears a onesie and has been missing in action for some stupid amount of time.

JR's good looks and charm have carried him to the hearts of Nintendo fans the world over, and his versatility makes him one of the most open-ended fighters available. He's got the skills to rumble with the best, and the rep. to back it up. Being one of Nintendo's classic all-stars (even showing up in his own segments on the Saturday Supercade), JR was ready to go since Punch-Out.

THE ATTACKS


Donkey Kong JR, while an enigma, hasn't done an awful lot of fighting in his day. Aside from a pair of conflicts with Mario, JR spends most of his time gorging on mathematics and winning sports trophies. However, the bond between father and son is clear, so he'll be demonstrating of Donkey Kong's talents that have been thusfar ignored by good Sakura.

Up + B: Spinning Kong JR - Donkey Kong's "Spinning Kong" move doesn't do much for aerial lift, but it can carry him across great chasms. JR has emulated this move... somewhat. By extending his arms out and spinning at tremendous speeds, JR is able to keep himself afloat for a short while, and also manages to protect himself from those who might attempt to attack him in the air. However, because JR is much lighter than his father, but not a great deal weaker, the force of his spinning motions carry him higher into the air, giving him a great deal of distance and height to recover from. In addition to this, because JR has a lot less weight to haul around, this move can carry him for a much longer time than it can for his father. Also unlike his father, JR is able to cancel this move into any aerial melee attack, or even a dodge or shield.

Standard B: Barrel Roll - Those of you imagining Peppy Hare's meme phrase are a little bit off on this one. In Donkey Kong's debut in the self-titled Donkey Kong he was rather fond of chucking barrels at Mario to impede the plumber's progress. This trait has become iconic to the character, and even found a place as a core gameplay element in the Donkey Kong Country franchise, and descendants of the barrel continue to appear in Donkey Kong titles today. The barrel so well represents the franchise, that it's almost as well known as Mario's super mushrooms.

JR does his father proud by bringing the legacy back to life. In the Smash Bros. franchise, barrels are common items that are similar to crates, containing a number of items inside them. JR's barrels are a little different. To start, their on the smaller side of the spectrum, being shorter than JR himself. Besides that, the barrels don't contain items, but there is a surprising hiding inside the occasional blue barrel JR might toss at you.

A very hot surprise.

These flaming creatures, known as firefoxes, act in a manner similar to the Waddle Dees tossed by their ungrateful king. They peruse the platform they land on until they flicker out, causing burn damage to enemies who happen to be in their way. They can distinguish friend from foe, and make a point not burn the JR who spawned them.

In addition to unleashing firefoxes, blue barrels behave just as they do in the original game: they're faster than the typical brown barrel, they bounce instead of roll, and they deal about twice as much damage as the others. So if you find one of these tumbling your way, it's advisable to get the hell out.

Side + B: Elbow Rush - A character was recently introduced who is very similar in concept and design to Donkey Kong JR: Baby Donkey Kong! BDK made his debut in Yoshi's Island DS, where he helped Yoshi grab onto vines, smash through brick floors, and mow down enemies with his most identifiable attack: the Elbow Rush. While the older Donkey Kong hasn't been seen using the technique, it's not too wild to imagine his child performing a similar technique.

Down + B: Tossed Salad - JR's first and most useful weapon against his enemies in Donkey Kong JR were the numerous fruits that grew on the vines he traversed, and he hasn't forgotten that. This unlikely arsenal has never failed him before, and his Kong Kousins continue to use similar weapons to this day! JR tosses these fruits in an arch, making sure they cover both land and air. Though he can toss a variety of fruit, including bananas, strawberries, and pears, the different types are purely aesthetic. These fruits are somewhat heavier than your average fruit, so getting hit by one is kind of the same as having one of those dinky candlepin bowling balls hucked at you.

While in the air, JR will toss these fruits straight down, just like he did back in the day. From this angle the fruits fall much faster, and deal significantly more damage, so while JR doesn't come equipped with a Simian Slam, it's probably not a good idea to get beneath him.

Final Smash: Grapevine - Maybe these vines aren't for grapes, but they're certainly for apes. JR's well known for his climbing capabilities, and they're just what he needed to help him rescue Papa Donkey Kong back in the early 80's. It's really no wonder that he would use those smarts of his to find a way to bring them any confrontation he may encounter.

But it's not like they can appear out of the air, even if JR grabs a Smash Ball. Oh no, he had to put a little more effort into this one. One of JR's lesser known talents is that for tricks and traps, and there's no shortage of that mischief where Smash Bros. is involved. In Donkey Kong on the Game Boy, JR was the master of mayhem. With the pull of a lever, he could bring all sorts of untold harm to the mustached hero. And with a flick of his wrist and some classic influence, those same levers drop a vine curtain over the stage.

"Look what I got! Look what I got!" - JR with his switch.
Also, that annoying kid who just got the Smash Ball.

With the switch pulled, JR leaps up into his natural element: the vines that have just lowered from an invisible, magical crane in the sky. Up there, above the chaos below, JR makes himself right at home and abandons these newfangled controls for simpler timers. Up, down, left, and right are all this ape needs to make his way through the forest. While he's up there, fruit will spawn on the vines. These fruits are much larger and heavier than the ones in his down special, each about the size of JR himself. If he happens to touch one of these fruits, it will plummet through the stage below, striking his enemies like a meteor.

And it isn't bad enough that JR can drop apple-shaped anvils from above, but those annoying snapjaws Mario commanded in Donkey Kong JR now work for the gorilla. They travel down the vines and drop onto the stage, looking for an easy snack. The blue ones are a little derpy, and will just drop off any ledge they come across, but the red ones have a mighty long stick up their butt, and will charge at anybody unfortunate enough to be one the same platform as them.

If you aren't quite sure how this all plays out, it's basically like a large-scale version of the actual Donkey Kong JR game. And if you still aren't clear on that, here's a video to help you out:

A Closer Look: There's more to JR than just special moves and Final Smashes. JR's play style is very primal and ferocious, much like his father's, but he's got a little more control over what he's doing, and he's faster about it. Unfortunately, he isn't quite strong enough to carry his enemies around, so he's stuck with the basic grappling maneuvers of every other character.

A notable move in JR's arsenal is his basic dash attack (A while running). This move, to continue the theme of JR picking up his father's slack, is actually Donkey Kong's signature somersault technique. Not only does this clear the way for JR's entrance, but it can be followed up in a variety of fashions. In true DK flavor, if JR is to jump while perform the somersault,  he'll jump farther than he normally would. Additionally, the somersault move can be canceled into a special kick that knocks enemies into the air. This can be nifty for clearing out opponents you don't really want to deal with, or setting somebody up for an aerial combo.

The Stats


Size - 5/10
Weight - 7/10
Strength - 7/10
Speed - 6/10
Jump - 8/10

The Breakdown:

Size - In most of his appearances, JR is either as large as or larger than Mario. I was almost tempted to make him larger than the ol' redcap, but decided against it because I didn't want to get too close in size to Donkey Kong SR. While JR might be large, he's still smaller than even half the size of his father, and it would be pretty weird to have him almost as large as an adult ape and still wearing a onesie.

Weight - JR is, of course, an ape, and apes are heavy. He's not as heavy as his father is, but JR isn't exactly on the lighter side of things either. In Yoshi's Island DS, Baby Donkey Kong is heavy enough to weigh Yoshi down, and that isn't easy considering the kangaroo-like legs those dinos have. JR is actually even larger than BDK, and since neither Mario nor Luigi are heavy enough to weigh down the appetite machine, it only makes sense that he'd be heavier than them both.

Strength - JR has the simian strength of his father, but in a slightly smaller package. Still, he's a lot tougher than most contenders, and it wouldn't take a whole lot of effort on his part to pound someone into the ground. Actually, in Mario Tennis for the N64, Donkey Kong JR's swings provide more power than even than adult Donkey Kong. Of course, this can easily lead to more outs, so I can only assume that this was a lack of control on his part, and that Donkey Kong was masking his true strength to avoid committing tennicide.

Speed - You might think that "heavy, and strong" goes along with "slow", and that's the case for most characters. But, again shown in Mario Tennis, JR is a speedy little bugger. He might not be as fast as the Speed class characters like Birdo and Baby Mario, but he's still more capable of putting dirt behind him than either of the Mario Bros.

Jump - Though JR and his father are large and heavy, it's in an ape's nature to never touch the ground. Despite being the second heaviest character in Melee, Donkey Kong could jump nearly as high as Captain Falcon and Luigi. That's almost ridiculous, but it makes a lot of sense. From what I've seen, JR jumps about as high as his father does, and if not, he jumps a little bit higher because he has less weight holding him down.

A Closer Look: JR might seem a little overpower at first. He's strong enough to arm wrestle with Ganondorf, quick enough to leave Mario and Luigi in his tracks, able to leap tall platforms in a single bound, and to heavy to be tossed away without a little punching around. But there's a balance to all of this, don't worry. Most of JR's attacks have a fair bit of lag, less than his father's, but still a significant amount of it. The ones that don't (such as the somersault) aren't particularly terrifying attacks, and despite having various cancel or combo options, once he's coming out of an attack, he's a little slow to pull himself back together.

The Alternate Palettes

Super Mario Kart's sprites are way too fun to recolor.

Palette One: The standard JR colors, of course. Nothing else would do for his basic color set!

Palette Two: JR's Red Team costume shows just how much respect he has for his father. He borrows DK's classic red and yellow necktie color scheme and translates it over to his trademarked onesie. What better way to show family pride?

Palette Three: The Super Kong is famous among the Kong's, and a personal hero of JR. He we see his Super Kong JR get-up, which also serves as Blue Team color scheme.

Palette Four: Again a mimic of his father's wardrobe. JR's Green Team costume hides him pretty well in jungle terrain. Perfect for hunting unsuspecting enemies.

Palette Five: JR isn't the only infant ape to play a major role in the Donkey Kong franchise. Long after JR had begun to fade from the hearts of children everywhere, Donkey Kong Country III came out and brought with it the infamous Kiddy Kong. Kiddy is definitely younger than JR, but much, much stronger, and played a role very similar to that of DK in the original Donkey Kong Country. JR shows his appreciation for the Kong youth by wearing his cousin's pajamas.

Now, who wants a hug?

Palette Six: JR's lesser appreciated educational title Donkey Kong JR Math demonstrated Nintendo's ability to simply not give a crap and give all of their characters 2P color swaps. At least Ms. Pac-Man had a mole. Either way, the pink Donkey Kong JR has become kind of an enigma, as nobody is quite sure whether it truly is a palette swapped JR, or if it's a separate child entirely. One thing is certain, however: JR isn't going to make the message any clearer. He's just going to wear the mystery like it's a sport coat.

Seriously, what is this? I smell another blog...
Or some monkey poo...

THE VICTORY THEME


No character is complete without their own victory theme. Unfortunately, Smash Bros. chooses its themes by franchise, so the tired old thing that DK's been using will have to do.